Hello -

Hi, Thanks for being brave enough to share this.  I imagine it is only natural to not want to be a carer. None of us are born to it. Even as a professional, folk need to switch it off and be themselves.  I hope you find your answers.  I am at the start of caring for a deteriorating loved one and the emotions and experiences you describe mirror ours.  Your poor mum sounds like she is struggling too and how can we expect our loved ones to cheer us up or support us when they are being assailed by these horrible treatments?  I hope you can find support somewhere.  I phoned the Macmillan nurses and had a very helpful conversation. We all need our feelings validated and I certainly have a tendency to put mine aside which makes it harder to manage them.  Talking to someone helps me to be more patient at least, less irritated.  My experience of side effects is from chemo and there are bad days and better days, but no good days. .I hope you and your mum get some better days soon.  Sending hugs. 

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. It is genuinely appreciated. I think I will ring the nurses to discuss. We have a MacMillan nurse team allocated that we can ring but I have left two messages and not had any return call. Feels frustrating. Will try to contact via the website. I have used the chat function previously which was helpful. Thank you. 

The phone number on the website put me through to a counsellor then she patched me through to a nurse and they were both completely lovely and it was just nice to be talk and be heard. We all need that. We all deserve that.