Today felt a bit much

You're not alone in how you feel. In fact, it's quite normal, in this very abnormal situation that you find yourself in. I feel the same. I can't really offer any advice, or a miracle cure, or to wake you up from the situation you're in, but you've found a good place to come and be supported here when you need it.

I think that taking time for your mum, and time for yourself is the correct blend. Look after yourself in order to look after your mum.

Thank you, I appreciate your kind words. It helps knowing I’m not alone in how I feel, however sad that others are going through such difficult times too. 

Hi!

Yes I think we would all get where you are coming from. My husband is in the throes of bowel cancer treatment but all his treatment there had to stop due to him developing sepsis at the beginning of the year. He started a 2nd line of chemo via a PICC line just before Christmas but only got to complete one session of that because he became very dehydrated and his kidney function was low and he had to be hospitalised. It was found that the chemo had actually done some damage to his kidneys so needed to be stopped again. In mid January he developed sepsis where his blood pressure dropped rapidly and he was violently shivering the paramedics arrived and one mentioned sepsis we thought it was just a really bad infection he got which of course sepsis is but can be fatal. He was admitted to High Dependency for 10 days and then got home. He was home for two weeks then had to be readmitted again but is home again now and is doing alright. The sepsis did a number on him though and his mobility has suffered slightly and he is very tired but contacting the Sepsis UK website has helped in that we have been sent information on the after effects of the illness- and there are many. Extreme tiredness and mobility issues are two of them. We have physiotherapists who are coming in to work on his mobility and his mood has also been very low and he doesn't seem to want to do much of anything other than stay in bed most days. Some days he doesn't get out of bed until mid-day but his sleep patterns are all out of sorts too he can be awake during the night and wants to sleep most of the day therefore turning day into night. I jus feel I don't recognise my husband anymore. He was one that was always up with the `dawn chorus` away out to work but since he retired 4 years ago it has just been rounds of Doctors, Hospitals, Clinics etc and before that he had very very seldom been in any of those places. Hospitals were just for visiting friends or relatives we know and yes he was always one for wanting to be out and about and now he is just happy to sit and watch TV all day. True what they say cancer can rob you of everything. Take Care. 

Vicky x

From reading your post it sounds like your mum has a similar diagnosis to my mum, so if you ever want to chat or ask any questions do feel free to get in touch. I'm on here often as I find this website a source of support.

Sadly after reading the various forums, I've not been able to find the magic cure or treatment that our medical team may have missed, so here I am.