I know it’s about him and not about me. My darling husband has throat cancer. He has so many serious issues, quad heart bypass, stent, femoral artery bypass , defibrillator in situ, so he can’t have chemotherapy or surgery because the general anaesthetic would be too risky. All of his teeth had to be extracted, his gums are sore and I’m trying to feed him appropriately. Radiotherapy starts end of December, his RIG to be fitted a fortnight before.
I feel so selfish for feeling sorry for myself. The fact is, I’ve been through this before with my late husband who had brain cancer. It’s all too much. We should be happy and enjoying our retirement, not putting on a happy face and worrying underneath.
Hi TrishaN
If we look at Looking after someone with cancer we can see how big an impact it can have on us - I certainly know I have felt overwhelmed and at times need to have a bit of break to recharge my batteries - otherwise I will not be everything I can for my wife when she needs me.
We often talk about a state of pre-grief on here, when we mourn the life we had planned, it can be helpful just to recognize this as it can make it easier to deal with.
<<hugs>>
Steve
