No idea what I feel

HI AmandadePanda

Oh I just want to give you a nig hug. I hear you. I get it. There have been plenty days over the past 21 months while I've been supporting my husband on his journey that I could have run away. Like you, I won't. 

Hopefully today is a brighter day for you.

This whole journey is a rollercoaster ride- an emotional rollercoaster- and there will be high and lows and days when you feel like you're looping the loop but we all have them, they're all normal and , you know what, they all pass. 

I have a close friend who I reach out to regularly to vent my frustrations and they frequently tell me "it'll pass."  So far they've been right. 

My advice for what it's worth is to take each day as it comes. Feel the emotions and let them pass and move on. Break each day down into chunks and work through the day one segment at a time. On the really rough days, take it an hour at a time but you'll get there.

You're not being a chicken about not chasing up the results either. I'm sure your mum's team will update you both soon.

Stay strong. Breathe! You're doing so much better than you give yourself credit for here. Remember too you can always call MacMillan on the helpline number below.

Sending you a huge virtual hug. Hang in there.

love n hugs

Wee Me xx

Thank you so much.  Hug accepted and sending one back xx

Hi AmandadePanda 

We are going through something similar with our dad so just want to let you know that I understand how you feel. It is so hard and we also ride the lows as well as the highs. Don't forget to take care of yourself though. Thinking of you and your mum. 

x

Thank you for sharing.  Hearing that others feel the same really helps x

I know how you feel. My mum recently had ultra radical surgery (that's literally what it's called) to remove her female organs plus other bits. Because the cancer spread its stage 4 and she's due to start chemo. I'm an only child and I'm currently looking after whilst holding down a full time job and putting IVF on hold. It's killing me seeing my mum so frail after her operation and I know it's going to get worse during chemo. The situation is also brining up old childhood tramua for her too. 

Sometimes I wish I could close my eyes and wake up from this nightmare. We don't know if it's curable but they’re giving it their best shot and she's taking it one step at a time but I'm inherited a worrier and I worry about everything. I can't lose her, not sure how I'd manage without my mum. My fiancé is supportive but she's my mummy, even with me being 40.