My husband has just been diagnosed after 2 years of misdiagnoses

Hello JoeyB

Welcome to this forum, I apologise that it has taken a bit of time to respond, I can see that you have posted in other forums and received some lovely responses from both Latchbrook and Thehighlander,  Sometimes it does take a while for others to come back into the forums and offer their responses, I do hope that happens there soon.

I read your post and it reminded me very much of my own experience, different cancer, My Husband has Oesophageal, but he too has liver secondaries, and his chemo, for a time was the type where he was not allowed anything cold, painful hands and toes, and of course just being given the diagnosis.  I understand the being petrified, but we knew early on that the cancer was not curable, only treatable.

Sometimes, as the person on the other side of the diagnosis, it is difficult to know what to say, what to do, stay positive, not completely focus on only negatives and lay awake at night listening to him breathing, just to make sure he is..(well that is how it had been for me) but, we also provide encouragement, we focus on what we can to make the day a better day, we cook the food that might provide the magic to help fight the cancer and We Cope...Somehow! because that is who we are, we find out own inner strength, we can and will cope and do everything in our power to make every day have moments of love and laughter.

Scared, definitely, Alone... even with everyone I have around me, yes, sometimes I feel alone, but then, sometimes I need that alone time.

You will find your own way, you will know instinctively what to do, you can also reach out here, we are here for you..

Wishing your husband all the best with his treatment and also wishing you positivity and strength

Lowe'

It’s the club none of us want to be a member of, isn’t it. 

My husband started off with colon cancer that went to his liver and then lungs. Chemo is brutal but you do get used to the pattern of it - mine found the cold thing for the first few days of the cycle. It’s really worth documenting as it helps to know ‘ah yes, this is like last time and it lasts x days’ so you can manage things. 

Like your husband, the nerve endings were a problem - have they given you anything for the indigestion? If not, get something.   And after chemo get him to drink as much squash/water as possible to flush all the toxins out - that made a real difference. 

Good luck. 

Hi JoeyB - I am so very sorry to read about your husband and what he has been through over the last two years.  So pleased he is getting the treatment he needs at last. I bet the stoma must have provided much relief for him after all that time. How is he getting on with it? It’s quite a change to get used to.

My husband is 46 too and was diagnosed with bowel cancer last summer after months of the GP insisting he had constipation. We have been through the hardest year of our lives, and were told he is terminal in April. Two stomas (the tumour took out one) and two nephrostomies later (radiation damaged his bladder beyond use), we are now on round 7 of chemo in the hopes of giving him a little longer.  To say it rocks your world is an understatement isn’t it.

I have to say that you have taken a big step in joining this forum as you will never again feel alone. We are all with you and understand exactly what you are going through and feeling and living.  There is always someone here who just gets it and that makes all the difference.

Big hugs x

Hello and a huge thank you for your response. 

I am so sorry to hear of your husband's diagnosis. 

Our GP kept saying it was IBS even though my husband kept telling him it wasn't.  I feel angry at them for missing such vital signs but I don't have the energy for an additional battle.  

The stoma I think was more of a shock to me - I just wanted to weep at what had happened to my husband.  How was it all possible to go so terribly wrong so quickly.  But he has adjusted to it and if only that was the end of it.

Having watched his mother and brother fight and lose their battles I think this is what scares us the most.  

I try to take each positive as a gift ... sounds strange but the smallest of things make me grateful.  I know it will get worse.

Hugs back to you x

Hey wooow a lot going on. 
Give me a shout if u wanna have conversation. Sometimes it’s good to talk to someone who go through the same thing  
I gave up sharing my daily news with friends cuz I reached that point . 
Let me know if u would like to talk or something .