Hi everyone,
I have been a member on her for quite some time. I joined in late 2016 (or early 2017) when my husband's prostate cancer got worse and I felt that it was time to connect with other people who were caring for their loved one with cancer. In 2017, a scan revealed that Paul's cancer had spread to his liver and there was only palliative chemo going forward. In the 10 months from when they found the liver mets to his death in May of 2018, I was his sole carer and this forum gave me so much strength. After Paul's death, I decided to stay on this forum because I wanted to help other carers - or was hoping I might be able to help other carers - but I haven't been active here at all. So much has been going on over the last three years - yes, this May it will be three years since Paul died. I wrote a blog on this site talking about my experience as a carer and the early stages of bereavement. I have trained as a death doula with Living Well Dying Well and End Of Life Doula UK in order to be able to accompany people at the end of their lives and their families and friends. I have changed the work in my practice and specialise now in working with people who are going through grief and bereavement, people with a terminal cancer diagnosis and family carers. And those are only some of the things that have been going on for me during the past three years. Anyway, I want to be more present here from today going forward and I would like to say to each and everyone on here: I am so sorry you find yourselves in such a difficult situation and I admire your strength and courage and really love that you have come on here to be connected with other carers, something that is so so important.
Lots of love, Mel.
Hi @mel,
Welcome - I can see how cancer has really changed your life - certainly mine too including at work. My wife's cancer is incurable but for now at least stable. Add in the mix of my ankolysing spoindilitis and my sons high functioning autism tends to make something of a question in our household as to who is going to be the carer today.
In my work they have just created a new staff network - disability matters - to support all the staff wit a disability, their carers and their managers and help us all get the best outcome for us all. Recently members of that group called me inspirational - well I do not always feel inspirational, I have fallen, I have failed, I have cried. As they say though “It's not how many times you get knocked down that count, it's how many times you get back up. ”
To all my friends on our journey in life, especially those on here, I thank you
<<hugs>>
Steve
