Hi
this is the first time I’ve posted on this site so not sure what I’m actually asking? I’m an only child so myself and my immediate family have helped with mums care along with carers for 18 months and we all work full time. Mum was diagnosed with lung cancer at that time and declined treatment but hasn’t had any symptoms apart from a cough, she has COPD. She also has dementia and MS but only mild. She has had several falls over the last year and 5 in the last month culminating in her injuring her pelvis again so is now confined to bed, we have had a hospital bed installed. Mum is now saying she has other pains in her abdomen not related to constipation, so the district nurse gave her a small morphine injection on top of the codeine the GP has prescribed. This is necessary because the carers findl it difficult to change mums pad when she is crying out in pain. We have meds’ for end of life in the house already in place but not used yet apart from the injection last night. I’m worried because the care company are having difficulties and haven’t got capacity to stay longer so we really are at our wits end. The GP says best place is for mum to stay at home and that’s what mums always wanted. As well as this dad also has dementia and is confused about what is happening we know it will be a huge issue to deal with dad when mum passes as we have had traumatic times when mums been in hospital previously when she’s fallen. We just wondered if we could find more help for mum somehow as we are exhausted and the care company may say they can’t continue. Mums 84 and dad’s 91. Any advice would be good, sorry it’s such a long post! Thankyou
Hi @jacki321,
No worry about any posting here, we are all at different stages in life and lots of lived experience to share and if we can help each other in any way things can get easier for all of us.
When my wife was in a similar situation with her dad and we had similar with both my mum and dad their GP recommended a review of their needs assessment and our carers assessment. Often these two go hand in hand but the focus is different between the "patient" and the team offering care - and that of course includes you and what you need.
In my parents case we managed initially to get them in to supervised accommodation, basically they lived independently in their own flat but they had fall alarms and pull cords and 24/7 help was on site. That worked really well for some years but then my dad got worse and eventually his needs were so high they could not really be met outside a care home or hospital - very familiar with hospitals :-(
I would not be overconcerned about them using the morphine though - I was pumped full of it when I had a heart attack and it is very effective. It is normally more restricted because of the issues around addiction but it is not likely they will make your mum and more drug dependent than she might be already - my wife and I both rattle.
<<hugs>>
Steve
