So, nearly four years into caring for husband with incurable cancer, lymphoma, I am joining this group to feel someone understands. I don’t need sympathy just a listening ear.
We now have the end of life diagnosis and from being fairly alone in our “journey” we now have everyone ringing or knocking on the door, but where are they when you need them! He is now extremely physically frail, but obstinate as a bull. A new treatment commenced last week including high doses of steroids. His feet and calves are full of fluid and painful. I rang hospice for help, was told to ring 111, they referred to local doctor, after three further calls and explanation he is not mobile I was informed a home visit had been requested, 8 hours later a doctor called. In the meantime I called the haematology Ward (as instructed by nurse specialist)and where he has been an inpatient for advise. This was keep on diuretics see how he is on Monday.
By 6pm he is fuming, the weather was apocalyptic but he informed me he wanted certain shopping and he was going out to get it, a man who can hardly walk, nothing wrong with his temper taken out on me.
Well, after the last ten years where I cared for parents with cancer, losing friends and then my husband without any respite I flipped. I put my coat on and said I was going, I felt bullied by him and ignored by the supposed support systems and believe me I was out the door in pouring rain and howling gale. So jump forward to today, we are friends again, I love him and am heartbroken, but I will not be made a victim by the system or him. I have got the shopping although probably now he won’t want half of it. To be honest it’s just another day.
Hi ,
I really hear you and I think all on here can really feel for you. I was off with stress a while back and my doctor prescribed "eco-therapy" - I asked "what?" and he said take a walk.
<<hugs>>
Steve
