Help with breast cancer at 33

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Hi I’m new here and I just got diagnosed with breast cancer at 33, I’m in shock and scared when I heard the big C last week from Breast Unit and biopsy shows cancer has been detected in my lump and lymph nodes. It’s very unfair I am still too young and in my prime. I have a husband and we’re planning to have a family, and everything has just fallen apart. 

I lost my mum to breast cancer a few years back, she was 59 and flashbacks of her experience and dying keep repeating on my mind. IDK what to do and who to talk to.

I’m so scared for my life… I have yet to take my CT scan and bone scan next week and I’m so scared cancer has spread somewhere like my mum’s, and I hope it’s not at all. I have thoughts that I’m going to die like her

I fear the scans will not be good. I hope it’s not spread yet, please can anyone help me how to not worry about my scans results, as I’m getting too stressed, having sleepless nights, back pains and tight chest. I constantly worry what if they find something. I’m frightened! I can’t focus at work and my normal life. I talk to friends but they don’t understand what I’m going through. Shall I be worried with the full body scan? What are the symptoms that cancer has spread to other parts?

  • Hi Yowniz

    Welcome to the forum and I am sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with breast cancer and that you lost your Mum to the disease.  What you are feeling is perfectly understandable as a cancer diagnosis is a frightening one to get particularly as you have lost your mother the disease.

    As a general rule breast cancer is very treatable and treatments are improving all the time.  There will have been improvements in treatment even since you lost your mother to the disease.  The wait on scans and results is hard but once you know your treatment plan things should start to improve.  It might be a good idea to talk to your doctor about freezing some of your eggs for when you are ready to have children.

    | was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer in my left breast  just over four years and and after having treatment I made a full recovery.  Last year I was diagnosed with a different cancer in my right breast which I had treatment for and I am currently in remission.  I had to have a CT scan and a bone scan both times as there was cancer in my lymph nodes and both scans came back clear.  You would have some pain if it has spread to other parts of your body.

    The best thing you can do is to try not to worry about your scan results is to keep yourself busy doing the things you love to do.  And whatever you do do not Google your type of breast cancer as the data on google is years out of date. Rely on sites like this one and Breast Cancer Now for your information. Get out for a walk everyday if you can as it helps to forget your troubles for a while.  I also found reading and listening to my favourite music helpful and going out for walks with  my dog.

    If you have a Maggie's centre or another cancer centre near you why not give them a call or call in to speak to someone about how you are feeling.  You can also call the Macmillan helpline on 0808 808 0000 to talk to someone.

    Wishing you the best of luck with your scans and with whatever treatment your medical team puts you on.

    Best wishes

    Daisy53

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  • Hi Daisy53, Appreciate your reply so much! I’m so sorry you had to go through it twice. I just had CT chest/abdo/pelvis with contrast today, it’s a bit painful in the vein right now. Then Friday NM bone and full body scan and they said another biopsy in calcification they found from mammogram. What was your treatment plan before and now? I was told mastectomy, and I’m scared to death. I never had surgery before. I hope you’re keeping well, must be terrifying for you to have it twice. I will include you in my prayers Pray

  • Hi, I’m sorry to hear of your diagnosis. It is such a difficult and scary time. Don’t beat yourself up about being scared it’s perfectly normal. It’s even tougher for you im sure having seen your mum go through it, but treatments and medication is generally getting better and better.

    I was diagnosed last summer just as my daughter was finishing primary school which was a tough time for her. I was 46 so older than yourself but still it is way too young.

    My pathway to treatment felt like it took forever as they kept scanning and testing and sending me for biopsies. My my onc. surgeon kept promising me it was the right thing to do and to trust him. He wanted to be as sure as he could be exactly what he was dealing with so that he got it right the first time. I will always be eternally grateful to him for being so precise. If it had been left as just the initial ‘you need a lumpectomy’ they would have missed so much.

    I ended up requiring a single mastectomy (I was lucky I was able to have an immediate reconstruction), 4 months of chemo and then a month of radiotherapy. When I got that plan it felt like forever. But once your in the routine of everything it goes so quickly.

    Because they found cancer in my lymph’s in all my initial checks I to had all the the big scans that you are having, I was fortunate that it hadn’t spread anywhere.

    The surgery is a very scary thought, like you I’d never really been in hospital other than to have my daughter. Knowing that you are going to wake up after surgery and not knowing what to expect is a horrible feeling. But do you know what, it all happens so fast and actually all you can really think and worry about is getting home to your own bed!

    Im still here and for that I’m grateful. I feel well and I’m just waiting to see my surgeon at the beginning of December for a check up. I am on tablets for the next ten years and I just keep everything crossed it stays away.

    You are way tougher than you know yet but trust me you will get through this. Just take one step at a time. Trust in your oncology team, don’t overthink it, at this point there is nothing you can do about it so you have to keep the faith, go where you’re told and when you’re told.

    Breathe, gentle exercise, fresh air and lots of water. You got this!

    Shout on here if you have ANY questions - someone will always be able to help if not just offer a kind word and an ear xxxx

  • Hi Yowniz

    The first time I had breast cancer I had chemo, a lumpectomy and radiotherapy.  The second time I had a lumpectomy, complete removal of my lymph nodes in my right arm then chemo and radiotherapy.  I am currently on a anti-hormone drug for the next five years and a twice yearly infusion for the next three years to keep my bones strong.

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  • Thank you for your reply. I just had a bone scan today with radioactive. I still don’t have HER2 result since my diagnosis two weeks ago. They also booked me in for stereo mammo with vacuum next week because of calcification in cancer boob. I had a painful biopsy and mammogram, and getting both at the same time - I’m freaking out right now!