When does it end

Hi Kieve welcome to the forum. Im sure that what you say about it belonging anywhere or not contributing to anyone's life is not true at all.

It does sound like you are in a pit of despair and maybe things are not as bad as you feel that they are.  I know that the Breast support group that I attended, before Covid, a lot of the women who had finished chemo  termed these feellngs of forgetfulness "Chemo Brain" and apparently there is such a thing as that. 

The other thing I wondered about is if you have heard about an article By Dr Peter Harvey entitled "After the Treatment Finishes, What now" . It is an excellent article and I wonder if you had the chance to read this that some of what you are saying and feeling would start to make some sense for you.

Thanks for your kind words. It does mean a lot. I  will look up the article that you suggested.

Hi..my first time on any forum and taking about my.experience with cancer. 

I feel exactly the same way as your described kieve. I had a lumpectomy just over a year ago and then high intensity radiotherapy. I'm on crazy amount of tablets now as a preventative and recieve the zoladex injections (which are the worst) not only how painful they are but also knowing they're 'putting my ovaries to sleep so likely hood of having more children are slim. I also suffer with lymphedema and struggle with my arm. I've gone from a fit and healthy 31 year old to feeling like an older lady that can't even change the bin...I feel lost and I don't belong. My memory is non existent and can't remember the simplest things. I have no motivation..im seeking the old me. I do work alongside a counsellor but just want to be back to being me....