Really scared

Hi Bondgirl!

I'm going to have mastectomy next week.

Most people with cancer will understand. During my last holiday I asked my husband to take many photos of me, with my long blond hair. If I get chaeno, they will never be blond again, and certainly npt long for many years.

I'm sharpish to people questioning my surgery choices. They are not in my shoes and nobody really knows how I feel.

I hace been given advice to concentrate on things I really like. So far, being busy and connecting with friends works. I often make a point to not talk about my illness and have a lot of fun. Many people listen and deliver. I had many failed IVF's in the past, and sometimes felt really low. Reading funny books helped me a lot as well. 

The treatment for breast cancer is good, and we have to believe in it. It's also OK to cry after loosing a part of your body, that's normal. You are grieving after your loss. And you will make many, many years of wonderful memories with your daughter. It is a difficult period in our life. 

Good luck with your treatment! 

P

Thank you P. Good luck with your treatment too.  I didn't have much pain after my surgery so I hope you are the same. I am now 3 weeks post-op.  Yes, I am focusing most days on the good and hobbies, partner etc,  but the odd day is sad.  I know it's expected, normal even.  But obviously we will have the thoughts of what if it recurs, how will I know if it recurs, how soon, where, and 1000 more.   I'm just trying to process.  

Best wishes

We will have dark days for a long time but need to focus on positive stories of people who survived the cancer. 

I really hope that my pain will be under control. Thank you for sharing yr experience. 

P