Telling Family

Spikup 6 months ago

3 replies
7 subscribers
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Hi,

I am a 24 year old woman and have found out that I likely have the BRCA2 gene mutation. I do not have cancer and have only found this out as I took part in a research study looking at my local area and the role of genetics in health and different conditions. I have a relatively small family history of breast cancer (each of my grandfathers had one sister with breast cancer) and no history of ovarian cancer to my knowledge.

I am heading for full testing as the research study only uses a saliva sample. At some point I will have to tell my parents and my brother. I worry about how I will share this news with them, both in terms of me having the BRCA2 mutation and the potential of them having it also and what that means for them. I feel like it must be unusual to find out about BRCA2 as the youngest present generation, I still have one set of surviving grandparents also and I'm scared of giving my family this news.

In my eyes I am grateful to have discovered this at an early age and I feel greatful that I now have a chance to process what I have learned and consider all options carefully. I feel that I have been given foresight, rather than learning about BRCA2 in hindsight if I were to be diagnosed with a cancer further down the line. I do worry for my family who are older, and what this means for them.

If anyone has any advice or support to offer, or if anyone has been in a similar situation, I would really appreciate hearing from you. Thanks!

latchbrook 6 months ago

Hi Spikup and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.

I haven't been in your position but I noticed that your post hadn't had any replies yet. Responding to you will 'bump' it back to the top of the discussion list again.

Sending virtual ((hugs))

"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

Moomin123 5 months ago

Thank you for sharing your experience and I hope you have been able to find support through friends or professionals, it can be quite a lot to process especially finding out before your family. I found out I have the BRCA1 mutation, but found this out after my mum was diagnosed with ovarian cancer 18 months ago. It has been hard talking about it with her sometimes, but she has been a big support too.

When I found out I was at risk I found this resource helpful - https://patientinfolibrary.royalmarsden.nhs.uk/brca1brac2 - and it also has a section about telling family. Hopefully your next step will also being put in touch with a genetic counsellor, who hopefully will be able to support you too. Your GP, whilst not a specialist, might also be a good person to discuss with in the meantime.

I think the reasons you share above about being grateful for knowing in order to be able to take action is very similar to what the guide shares about letting family know - it gives people information and choices. It's definitely a difficult conversation, and I know me and my family have needed time to process it, but I am certainly glad I found out I was at risk and so could consider what that meant for me and how I wanted to use that information.

On telling older relatives - my mum was diagnosed around 60, and she has three siblings around a similar age. One chose not to find out, and two did (with one positive, one negative.) The person who was positive has since gone on to have surgery where pre-cancerous cells were found - this means she has potentially avoided going through what my mum did, so finding out has hopefully had a huge, positive impact on her life. It's also something that family members can go on to talk to medical professionals about further to decide what is right for them.

It's my first time posting on here but I hope this was a little helpful - you sound like a caring person, wishing you all the very best!

Spikup 5 months ago in reply to Moomin123

Thank you for using your forst ever post here to send this reply, I really appreciate everything you've shared with me.

I have seen the Royal Marsden document and have found it really informative. I have told some family about my BRCA2 mutation since I posted this, and I sent them that document alongside Macmillans information page. I am hoping that with this information, and with an upcoming public talk from the research team in our community, my family will be able to make informed choices regarding their own opportunities for testing like yours has.

I have an appointment with a genetic counsellor in the next week and am hoping to gain a bit more clarity, as well as resources for support from them.

I am wishing you and all your family members the very best on your BRCA1 journeys.

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