My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Arrghhhh ... just on before I go to work .... I knew it, I knew it, I knew it. Patricia the only reason that your name wasn't top of my list last night before I fell into bed is because you must have been squished right in middle of the huddle where you belong at the moment.  Love to you - Judi xxxx

Just to wish everyone as happy a Christmas as possible,  and hoping for a better year for all in 2010.

Sue xx

Hi everyone.  Thank you for the Christmas wish and the lovely penguin picture Sue.  I hope everyone is okay this evening.  There is a slight layer of snow outside so I think I should be okay to risk going to the pub quiz in an hour.  If it looked like getting any worse I wasn't going to bother but I think It looks okay.  I haven't been for weeks and this will be the last one I go to until the New Year.  Tonight I have done all my cards that need to be posted and a few of those that are for hand delivery.  I have to confess to not having written any of them.  I made a label for inside.  I typed it in a fancy font that looked like handwritting.  After my name I put a small '&' sign but because of the font it looks like a little kiss then I got small gold stars from my crafting bits and stuck one next to my name on each label.  It looks Christmassy but I know that it says love from Ailsa & her star!  I did labels for everyone's address so I haven't written any of them at all.  If I had had to write them all with only my name I don't believe I would ever have done it.  Still, that's another job done.

Manda I saw from facebook that it looks like you and Hayley didn't get off today.  I am so sorry about that but I have always been sure that things happen for a reason.  I'm thinking of you both and sending you lots of ((((((bug higs)))))).

I have to nip into town tomorrow so I am going to look for a very small penguin to carry everywhere with me.  Thought it might help with the loneliness.  Well - I had better start to get ready for the quiz.  Take care everyone.  Ailsa xx

Evening all - Just a quick visit as I'm off to watch Countryfile shortly..................oh the excitements in my life!!!!  I feel a bit more cheerful today - although I've been awake since about 2;30 this morning - just couldn't go back to sleep so gave up and made a cuppa...........and found some inspiration for a cute card.  All your talk of penguins reminded me that I had some penguin stickers in my crafty stash - so I made a snowy picture and added the penguins!!!  That's from me to me - and will sit on my desk to look at as I think of you all and your support these last few days..............Thank you girls for being there and huddling round me.  I've managed to work my way away from the black hole - at least for now!!!  I gave the sitting room a good 'do' this morning and now the tree is up and decorated. So I'm feeling pleased with myself for once!!!!   Don't know why or how but Alan is looking a bit better and has smiled and chatted for the first time in ages....  Oh what a difference a day makes!!! I think I will go to bed happier tonight......  Love and heartfelt ((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) for you all  Dot xxxxxx

So glad you are sounding a bit brighter Dot.  Lots of love to you and chatty Alan ((((((bug higs)))))) Ailsa x

Dottee, so glad you`re feeling so much better and Alan too. Good news xxx

Ailsa well done on your cards, they sound lovely xx

Sue thanks for the wishes, I am sure 2010 will be better for us all, just wish it would come quickly.

I went to do a bit of shopping before and had a bit of a melt down! Just wanted to get out of there and run away, don`t want to do all the food shopping and queueing, etc. Panicking now about everything that needs doing before my bro and family come on Monday. Cried all the way home in the car, got one more day at work then will have to give myself a kick up the backside or put my undies on over my trousers like Judi said lol!! Don`t feel like Superwoman at the moment!!

Got another xmas party night tomorrow night, Abba night. Should be good!! We`ve all got our sparkly outifts and I`ve bought a feather boa too!! Whit whoo!!

Love and bug higs to everyone

Helen xxx

Evening all , well just thought i'd check in from snowy scotland ,The train journey wasn't to bad , i got my seat eventually and spread my case and laptop over the one at the side of me , The internet connection wasn't good enough for me to stay on for very long so i played on the games most of the time . The train was delayed 25 mins which meant i'd got 5 mins to get my connecting train in edinburgh , well if you can imagine a mad women running through a station , dragging a suitcase screaming "where do i get the train to Labert"   well that was me , i eventualy found platform 13 and aas i got there the train pulled up , good timing or what ? .Gordons cousins husband then picked me up , his sister was already there and his daughter came about a hour later , we had a lovely meal and we've been sat talking all night about Gordon and otheres that have passed . I'm not looking forward to tomorrow but i've come this far so i'll do it . Gordons other daughter phoned me this morning and said her dad would be proud of me for doing this on my own , cheers Jo for making me cry , bless .

Sue thanks for good wishes for next year , it can only be better we've all got lots of new friends now . Ailsa well done on the cards , i've given ,y calendars out now so defo no cards . Helen have fun on your Abaa night , i'm sure you'll enjoy it , i want to see pictures . What a bummer about the holiday Amanda , but sure everything will work out better in the new year .

Hope evreybody else is doing ok , Dottee , glad your feeling a little better .

Take care

Lynne

xxxxxxxxx

ps i love my new net book xx

A snowy good morning to you all

It is looking decidedly Christmasy outdoors now and I am relieved to say my positive mood has fianlly returned, lets hope it manages to stick around a while.

Well done Lynne for making the journey to Scotland alone.

Helen, been there with the shopping thing, sometimes things just get too much. Hope your Abba night goes well.

Dottee, don't really know your story but have seen you post, glad Alan is in better spirits.

It is funny listening to us all, the penguins, sky candles, our ledge etc all the things we put in place to help us find comfort. I am so glad I found this site, can't imagine what I would have done without my friends on here to talk to.

I am going into work today for the last day of term. They are having a bit of a party in the staff room after the children have gone home. Also need to check out the new computer system before I return in January.

Well only two weeks to go until baby day, hope the snow does not get too bad, wouldn't want Rachel to get snowed in and end up having to have home birth!

Hope you all have a good day, Lesley x

Ailsa, well done for getting your cards done, great idea your little star, wish I had thought of that. x

Good morning all. Could not get my car door open this morning. Had to get in from the passenger side. Oh what joy.

Lynne big hugs to you for the day (it will be hard for you).

Lesley, my daughter was born two weeks after Christmas and it was very snowy that year too lol.

Amanda sorry about the holiday.

Ailsa good idea about the star. I put love from Patricia   then drew a small heart and put a kiss under my name and the heart, but only on family cards. My daughter understood straight away. (Sorry if I already told you this).  Good luck with the penguin search.

dottee, judi, esme, helen, dave, gayle (anyone i missed out?) have a good day if you can.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x