It will be 2 years Christmas Day i lost my beautiful soulmate. I dream about him so much but they either romantic/sexual dreams or alot of dreams that hes ending the relationship, doesn't want me anymore, doesn't reply to texts and won't answer his phone. I wake up feeling even more awful as I want to wake up see him and know its just a bad dream, its like he has ended it but not in that way as we were so happy together. Makes me feel so angry and unfair all the time.
I dream about my Hubby most nights. But it's usually going over what happened and what was said in the weeks/ months up to his death. And it's the same ..really upsetting. I wake up screaming or cryg . And then I cry most of the next day. I think my brain is trying to change the outcome. I have many regrets on what I believe I should / could have done to keep him here. And now it's too late tohange everything. So painful. So very sad that our lives together have ended this way. I feel we wasted so much time . We just don't know when our future is going to be snatched away from us. 
