I feel as if my whole life is a sham, just one big pretence. I seem to have got very good at putting on the mask, chatting to people as if everything is normal and I am okay. I'm even doing it to friends now. The truth is that I'm broken and shattered and I hate my lonely pointless life, but no one would know. Sometimes I wish I could fall asleep and not wake up, but no one realises this. Why am I acting this way? Why have I become so dishonest with everyone? I've been to a garden centre with a close friend today, we chatted and shopped and on the outside I look and seem like everyone else. Then I close my front door and the real me descends. Is this normal? Is this how everyone copes? Looking and sounding normal when inside I feel dead.
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