At such a loss

Hi Elsa I'm Angela and I'm so sorry for your loss.

The world is such a cruel place sometimes.  I lost my husband 18 weeks ago and I don't think I've accepted it yet.  You are still so early on in your grief, just try to be kind to yourself.  Eat whatever you can manage.   If that happens to be chocolate and a mug of tea thats fine.  Rest when your body tells you to.  Everyone is different and for some it takes its time to process, I'm learning that too.  I keep telling myself off for not doing well but in truth my heart and my mind will only let me do so much and that's the same for you maybe.  

When your entire world is shattered and empty it will take us a long time to recover.  I forget that as I muddle along too.  Sending you much love.

Everyone on here is lovely so keep chatting.  It does help.

Hi Elsa,

I am sorry to read about your husband, its so recent for you. Your head will be all over the place.

You are in the right place, we are a lovely supportive bunch, and you can express your thoughts without anyone judging you,, because we all get it.

It can often feel worse after the funeral because you are so busy before that and slso I found anyway, that people start to disperse back to their normal lives that we dont have any more. 

Im almost 6 months after losing Tony to an aggressive sarcoma. I have to believe it gets better bit by bit because people tell me it does, but it often doesnt feel like it. If you get chance to read some of the conversations here, you will see that we are all in a similar position, devastated, lost, broken, there are many words we could use. 

It is good you have supportive friends, do reach out to them, good friends or family can be a real godsend during these early weeks and months.

A big hug coming your way.

Hi Elsa

All of this is so familiar to me. My husband died 4 months ago, I was his carer. The empty house is still so hard, and I feel the same about noticing all the couples holding hands, and feeling you are invisible. I too have supportive friends, but they all have their husbands. At least here we do all understand, and whatever you are feeling there are people here who get it totally. It is still so raw for you. 

I've learned to allow myself to do as little or as much as I can cope with each day. Some days I can manage a few things, other days I just cry and watch rubbish tv. Some days the grief is overwhelming. I don't think it has got easier, but it is slowly becoming more normal, and I'm getting used to having to live like this. Talking helps a bit, and coming here where everyone is so kind and supportive. I know none of this helps, I just wanted to reply to you and say that you are understood. Sending you a big heartfelt hug x