Sometimes I think I'm learning to do this, learning to cope on my own, to live without him. Then I fall into another one of those invisible black holes. They come from nowhere, no obvious triggers, nothing someone says, they just sneak up on me and down I go. Down so low that I don't know how to even try to pull myself out. I don't even want to.
Someone will text and say 'it's a lovely sunny day, you can get out into the garden' and all I can think is What's the point? Why bother? Who cares? These are the times I'm really struggling. I know they say to let yourself be in the grief, to be gentle with yourself, kind to yourself, but I just feel lost and so alone and angry and exhausted. I don't have any love for myself. I gave all my love to him, there's none left.
Do other people feel like this? Does anyone have any advice for these awful times? Nobody seems to understand how bad this can be, but I know you do.
