Two years ago today I lost my best friend and darling husband. We would have been married for 30 years in April and being widowed at 55 was definitely not in our life plan.
I feel like I’ve also lost a lot of friends, I hadn’t realised they were ‘couple friends’ and even sometimes, in the dark times, think maybe they only loved my husband and tolerated me.
We were a very close family, our three boys are moving on with their lives as they should and as we would want but I’m so alone. I’m scared of being a burden, of leaning on them too much.
I’m so lost, I’m lucky I’m financially secure so don’t have that worry but I don’t know what to do next, how to make friends as a single women and, if I’m very honest I don’t want to.
my head tells me to join a book club, find a hobby, try going on holiday alone but it feels like all my confidence has disappeared.
I don’t even know why I’m writing this other than in 5 mins it will be exactly two years and I’m sat here alone mourning not just him but the life we had and thought we’d have. I don’t feel I’ve moved on as much as I should have and that people expect
