Pancreatic cancer

My darling husband died today from  what was called pancreatic cancer, although it started in his stomach. He was given the all clear in October with the enjoy Christmas comment. 

He started to feel unwell in June, had a private scan 7 weeks ago which showed it had spread all over, and has been in and out of hospital since then.

Im heartbroken 

My darling hubby was diagnosed in May 2021, he passed away in March this year, so 18 months!....as soon as you hear the word pancreatic, you know a death sentence had been passed, he had an op to remove part of it, followed by horrible chemo, which he couldn't tolerate the full dose due to side effects, then sabre radiotherapy, then a 3 months later it had spread to his liver, so different chemo, but only to keep it at bay, but he felt so ill, that he never really recovered when next one due, so made decision to stop. He lasted 2 months after that and it had spread to his lung and spine! He hardly ever complained and I'm sure that in his last month, he hid how ill he felt from me, as he was determined to make my birthday, which he did, by 2 weeks, then his body just gave up! He was a warrior! 

Yes, it's not talked about enough and things don't seem to have advanced that much in terms of treatment for years, yet its such a deadly disease! I'm angry about it too and miss my hubby so bloody much it hurts! Our lovely men should still be here with us! x

I'm so sorry for your loss, pancreatic cancer is not talked about until it takes your loved one, so quickly and painfully, the pain is unbearable even with hospice care. We see about other cancers but not this prolific killer

I so agree with what is being said here by everyone. My amazing husband died of Pancreatic cancer 4 weeks ago. It is a brutal cancer and yet research into it has been underfunded for years and survival rates barely improved over the last 40 years! My husband was diagnosed with inoperable pancreatic cancer (it had spread to his liver) in May 2022. In retrospect so many red flags had been missed. Firstly, he was fit and healthy yet suddenly developed diabetes. Then, despite being super careful with what he ate, his blood sugar levels spiked to a really extreme level. Next, although he was a really healthy weight, he lost over 2 stone in a matter of a few weeks (which his GP said was probably down to his diabetes). It wasn't until he saw a locum that he was sent for tests and the cancer diagnosed. Sadly, having now found out more about this awful disease, I know that sudden onset diabetes, spiking blood sugar levels and weight loss can all indicate a real problem with the pancreas. Perhaps if Pancreatic cancer received more press/publicity GPs would be quicker to send people for tests? Once diagnosed my husband received brilliant care by his consultant and team at the hospital. He went on a drugs trial, which worked well initially. Even when that stopped being effective his consultant tried another type of chemo in the hope it might give him more time. My husband was so positive and showed so much courage. He put up such a fight and was determined it wouldn't beat him. But he died at home,15 months after his diagnosis. I am devastated at losing him and by what he had to go through and my heart goes out to you all too x                         

hi,my husband died 2 years ago of PC after just 3 months from feeling unwell.  We know it is underfunded sadly and the statistics of surviving 5 years is minuscule.  3 months is sadly the average I believe.

have you thought about logging onto the Pancreatic Cancer Uk site as they are always looking for people to  assist/review research.  Ive been part of various focus groups where teams are looking for early detection or cures and look for assistance in reading their findings to make sure it can be understood by the general public.  

Just a thought

Glenis 

Thank you, great idea, I will definitely see if there is anyway I can get involved/help. I know my husband got comfort from feeling that by going on a drugs trial he may have helped others that came after him. I would love to think there is something I could also do that may help x 

I lost my husband to PC just over 2 weeks ago and I saw him in the chapel of rest for the last time today which has broken me, as I will never see or kiss him again.

He was diagnosed in November and his last two and a half months were horrendous, but he never complained and was willing to try anything.

He couldn't eat for the majority of his time since diagnosed, as his stomach had stopped working. He had an NJ tube up his nose into his small intestine where he was fed and I administered enzymes every 2 hours. He also had an NG tube in his other nostril so that I could aspirate him every couple of hours to stop him from being sick.

We were together for 18 years and only got married 12 days before he died.

I am completely overwhelmed with grief and his funeral is on Friday and I am scared I will fall to pieces.

I cuddle the top he died in every night and I can't stop thinking I would rather be dead than living alone. I just want to be with him. I am scared how strong these feelings are 

You have written just how i feel that i would rather be with my husband than on my own. I am always asking him to come and get me so we can be together again.  Existing is horrible and i am already dead inside. I hope the funeral goes as well as a funeral can and that you will have lots of arms to support you.

I am so very sorry for what you are going through and send you my warmest wishes. This is so recent for you and you will still be in shock from it all. Do you have any family or friends that can be there for you? If so, please do reach out to them for any emotional or practical help you need. Your world has turned upside down and you need to be so gentle with yourself. I found the first few weeks after my husband died went past in a blur. I was, and still am, devastated by losing him. Initially I wrote lists of anything I needed to do each day. Just to give me something to focus on. You have his funeral coming up and I can understand you being scared about falling to pieces. But hopefully everyone who is there will be there because they care about your husband, and you also, and that you will find the love and support from them on the day brings some comfort. Do look after yourself. Take everything a day at a time, or even an hour at a time. And please keep reaching out to others if your feelings are scaring you. You are not alone, sadly so many of us really do understand what you are going through. Sending love. Georgie x    

Thank you for your kind words. The funeral was lovely and well attended. Now I feel I have no purpose, I collected his ashes yesterday and even though it is nice to have him home I still want to be with him as life is too hard to bear alone. I am taking sleeping tablets that don't work and I have started going back to work as a distraction but all I want to do is be at home.

Is grief counselling too early?