14 days without her.

I am sorry to hear the pain and loss that you describe.  There are not any rules for how we are supposed to 'be' or feel or react.  I wonder if you could contact the helpline on this site?  Maybe chat to your GP about being able to find some support?

I think that we are so busy and consumed with our own lives and then when someone dies we feel our own level of guilt, regret about the fact that we are unable to rectify this for the person who has passed away.  Perhaps keep the door slightly ajar for those that genuinely want to help?

Bereavement is devastating.....and time does help in terms of learning to live along side our grief and have happy memories and less pain. 

Please try to find someone to talk to - I am confident that your wife would have wanted you to find help and not to suffer.

Hope things become less stressful. 

Nance x  

i truly feel get, where you re coming from. it s all so traumatic, everything changes. the anchors the comforters that shared our life s, gone. the world seems a totally alien place. lost.

people can be speaking but i m not engaging, instead my insides are churning.

It is hard to comprehend. I am almost 3 months in from losing my lovely husband to bowel cancer after a 2 year battle and battle he did he took everything they could throw at him to beat this at one point actually doing so but the beast that is this disease decided it was coming back for him and eventually took him on the 23rd June this year. I was just beginning to `accept` that he is gone- but know I never will, and then I find that my sister now has bowel cancer. Her cancer is not as extensive as my husband's was however, and they think they have caught this in time and she won't need chemo or radiotherapy. Life can be so cruel. Some days I actually forget that my husband is gone I know that may sound weird but then something will happen that reminds me how much he is not here now. I've noone to laugh with and share opinions with anymore and to experience happy or sad events with. Our little granddaughter is growing into a lovely little girl and he's not here to see her do that and she was `the apple of his eye` when she was born. This month marks her 3rd birthday and its so sad he's not here to see it. I wish you well getting through this I's like to say it will get better but I'm still finding my way through also although people have told me that it will get better but just wonder when. My best wishes to you. Take Care of yourself.

xx