My wife

Mark, so sorry to read the sad news about your wife. It must have been so awful to hear the diagnosis when you had already been through the anguish of your own cancer fight... To then have to watch your beloved wife suffer. 

There is nothing anyone can say to make the pain of your loss go away, but hopefully voicing your grief to people on here, who can truly understand your pain will give you some comfort. Grief manifests in so many ways; the hurt, anger, heartache, loss, bewilderment, the sheer feelings of injustice at it all.

There is no right or wrong way of dealing with the pain, just take things at the pace that is right for you. 

Take time to look after yourself...

I am so sorry to read your story.....sending you love and strength.

So sorry Mark i feel your pain .Ilost my partner last wednesday .He battled lung cancer for 17 month and im heart broken .I hope we can all support each other on this awful journey xxx

Hi i do not come in here often, as i am a bit further down the line to everyone here.

I truly understand your situation, i was diagnosed with lung caner 2016, nearly three years treatment, finished on the 24th Dec 2018 my hubby got diagnosed on the 20th Dec 2018, and i lost  him, 8th Oct 2019.

Never ever thought that he would go before me, that was hard, he was my strength and rock, and i carry on as i know that is what he would want.

It was not easy at the start, though i am now three years down the line, never thought i would get past the first month.

Does it get easier, all depends what you mean, i still do one day at a time, some times, i fill like i am in robot mode.

Only people that have had this happen truly know how you  fill, my adult children grieved in a different way, it was there Dad.

I felt like was cut in half, did not know who i was without him, sixteen  when we met, and got to our golden Anniversary, a life time together.

I have only just started to find out who i am on there own.

You will get there in your own time, and then good memories ,will come back, i laugh now, when i think of our life together,  i still shed tears, not often, some thing takes me of my guard, the price of love, is to lose and it hurts.

,Use this group, when you have to, i would not have got this far, if it was not for the people here, when i needed them.

The road ahead will be bumpy, long and winding, though one day, you will reach, your destination, what ever it may be.

Ellie x 

Hi Ellie I do hope you don’t mind me responding to your post. I lost my husband today after 30 years together. You words about being just a half is exactly how I feel. I don’t know who I am without him. You’ve given me real reassurance that I will have a future all be it not the one I wanted. T x

Of course i do not mind.

That, is the only way, i could describe it, felt cut in half, was lost.

I am sorry and so so early,

I did not know who i was, was 16 when we met, and got to our golden,, never did anything without him, so yes lost.

It has taken a while, now i am starting to know who i am on my own.

Do not get me wrong, it is hard to start with, but as i kept saying, i have to do it as he would want me to.

You  will have a future, not the one we both wanted, but life goes on, though in a different way.

I am sorry for your loss today, it will hit you, did not for me at first, though after a year i had counselling, and it helped me.

Thank You for saying i helped in a little way.

xxxx