Its different for everyone, my died in Feb 22 and I can't even go his room.You can join sue Ryder breavmnet support- loosing a partner.There are many people there supporting each other.
Initially I managed to take the vast majority to the charity shop. It was 'easier' as I was helped by my step-daughter. I kept some items. Like with a few things, I'm discovering that the longer I leave it the worse it seems. I kept coats, jackets and 'favourite' footwear. I'm struggling now with the thought of doing something with them. I feel I have to at some point as I know that a certain person would be saying "What are you doing keeping these?" It's the balance of the reality and a sense of respect, I think, if that makes sense. I also wonder if when it is completely done that is part of us 'accepting'?
hi There’s no timescale, I still have a suitcase of clothes that I need to go through when I can. I gave a lot to Charity a few months after but 16 months on I still have a suitcase full.
When I feel I can I’ll go through. You will know when is a good time.
As others have said in reply, it really is up to and when you feel it is right. My Lin died in November 2021 and I still haven't sorted everything out. With the help of my daughter, I have probably done about three-quarters of her clothing but have kept important clothing from family events like our son's graduation and wedding plus my daughter's wedding. I still have to sort through her vast collection of cook books, of which my daughter and others have said they may like some of them. If I feel up to it, I might try and sort through the rest of her clothes in the New Year.
There's no rush though. You'll know when you're ready to attempt it.
Hi, this is such a personal and difficult thing to do. Nic died in February 2021 and I didn't give anything away until the December. He had a lot of coats, trackies, hats, etc, that I gave to a homeless charity for the winter. It took until June this year to donate most of the rest. You will know and feel when the time is right, whenever that might be.
I think the answer is that there isn’t a right time. I actually did this three days ago and it was truly heartbreaking. I lost Dave in October last year. I’ve kept a selection of things, his beloved football shirts, the shirt he wore to our wedding, his boots are still on the shoe rack on the hall and slippers still under the beside table, toothbrush in the bathroom etc. My son came and helped me so I didn’t have to physically take them out of the house -i just packed them away. The pile of empty coat hangers was one of the saddest things I’ve ever seen. Take care x
Morning everyone I have to say it really is so hard to do ,so I did Lynne's shoes first and asked our daughter and a couple of Lynne's friends to sort through and take what was ok for them then took the rest to charity shop but kept a pair and a pair of slippers then I did all the clothes with tags on she hadn't worn and asked our daughter and her friends to take what was ok for them, as yet I haven't taken any thing else to charity it is really hard to let just one thing go and as jillybean says seeing the bag full of coat hangers which I gave to donna is somehow really sad to see ,but I know I have to do it because I am seriously thinking of moving next year so I will do it one bag at a time ,lynne had tons of clothes and I will still keep plenty of things which I can picture Lynne wearing and hopefully they will in time give me good memories instead of sad ones best wishes everyone Terry
My Claire passed away on 3rd December so I am obviously still very new to the grieving process and things are still very raw. But this is something that I have been thinking will be so so hard to get round to eventually, and as you say seeing all those empty coat hangers I know will just be unbearable for me … a reminder of the huge gaping hole that now exists in my life
