Loss of my wife

Glad, you made it threw, it is hard at times, but some how we manage to get threw, and sometimes to not know how we did it,

She was right, your wife would want to to try and carry on, in her memory

.Ellie x

Thanks it was strange first birthday without her being there 

So many first's i have now done them all, does it get easier, not going to lie, sometimes  it does and other no.

No one knows what it is like, until they have to travel the road, we  we are on.

Never ever thought i would survive a month with out him, i know he wanted me to carry on, so in one way i do it for him , than my self.

One day at a time, then it becomes weeks then months, the only way to go,

I wish you a smooth road ahead.

Ellie x

Thanks it's been only been 5 months since she passed away it's night time and weekends are the hardest for me when there's no one around I miss her so much

Still early days, and you are right, the evenings and weekends, are still the hardest for me. Dread them and the dark nights, i have to Amit, that is when ii had to have counselling,  i could fill myself going down, and did not like it, one little bit.

Though every one is different, i started reading again, and crosswords, just to help pass the time, it helped,

You have to find your own way of coping, and some times we do not know what that is, because always been the two of you, i was lost, cut in half, who am ii without him,

I am still finding out, do not like it, but i am starting to survive  and that for me, is what i call it, though my family are good, but cannot be with me all the time, I would not want them to.

I do not like the bit, of doing his jobs, gardening, painting fences, sorting out bills, never done it, though i am now.

Hope others pop in for you,  i have to phone my hubby's , sister i always phone on a Tuesday evening.

Catch you again soon Ellie 

We have to take on so many new rolls that we did not expect, after my Adele died four years ago, it was the normal hell as it is for us all.   Then I found questions being asked by my daughter that normally Adele would answer.   You have to have to take on both roll, mum and dad and do the best you can, you can’t grieve, you have just have todo the best you can. I am honest with mine, telling them I not as clever as mum and muddle through the rest .

I don't  want councilng I know I should talk to someone  my family and friends  have been great also my running helps me come to terms with it ,I'm doing a half marathon in a couple of weeks for the macmillan cancer support in the memory of my beautiful wife  which I know it will help ,her daughter and family will be there to watch me run it hope the phone call went OK for you the other day keep going a day at a time  

That sounds like an excellent thing to do.

I have let the exercising go a bit but am aware that I have and also aware that I need to sort that aspect out again.

I just got my running t-shirt from macmillan to tun in gor the charity in the half marathon it's now getting  real and I have just over 3 weeks to go 

I have my Macmillan green tshirt for the August dance challenge where you pledge to dance for 20 mins everyday throughout August. It's easy to do and I've reached my £200 target already from my fb frends donations Enjoy your half marathon let us know your time