Hey - so I’m almost at 15 months without Becca. I’m slowly getting myself back on my feet with work and life in general. I miss her every single day and I’m incredibly lonely at times. I appear quite happy at work (on the outside) I’m going for a new role that should effectively be my dream job. It all comes crashing down at times with one little memory or trigger and I realise I’m perhaps not as together as I appear to others.
This afternoon I received an email from a car dealership saying “hello I hope you and Becs are well” and I think this is the first one in a while where I’ve had to say she’s passed. I almost feel a bit stunned. My uncle is going through end of life care and I’m just reminded all the time of the hard memories and the pain and fragile state she was in. I don’t know how I keep moving forward sometimes. Life is so cruel.
