Tomorrow will be 104 weeks since Colin died. The actual date is 5 April, but it was a Sunday when he rapidly deteriorated. The day before was a canny day. The weather was good and he sat by the window looking at the daffs in the garden for a while. None of us knew that was going to be the last time he would see it.
The daffodils have been plentiful again and I managed to cut the grass a couple of weeks ago, not quite to his standard
but at least it's been done with my toytown size lawnmower 
I just can't get the petrol one to start 
and am too impatient to wait for the lads to find the time 
2 years on and I still hate Sundays, going to bed on my own, getting up on my own and still cry on my own- though not as much or as often as I used to 
oh and overthinking too!
Heading to the cemetery soon to see friends a family who can make it for Colin the caterpillar cakes and port 
on the 2nd anniversary of loosing Colin. Had some lovely messages from his work colleagues today but I wonder if they would've still been in touch if me and 2 of his lads hadn't posted memories? Maybe that will be a test for next year??
Hopefully I've got most of my tears done for the day and won't make a show of myself this afternoon xx
D'you know what, it's been a lovely afternoon with all the right people calling along at different times remembering their dad, grandad (even though they're so young)friend, brother and acquaintance 
I feel really proud and happy 
xx
So pleased for you. Sounds lovely 
Bloody hell!!! I'd want 18 deleted from the world too!! You'll have to reverse the number to 81 if you ever need to use it 
-same with 23- always to be known as 32 
A lady I've met at the cemetery can't stand to write '16' - so she will do the 6 first then put the 1 in front 
x
