I never wanted kids, changing nappies and sleepless nights weren’t for me thanks! but that all changed the moment I saw the two lines of the pregnancy test. I was 18 at the time, we’d only eloped a few months prior. Nathaniel was over the moon especially after hearing we were having identical boys. He cried his head off at the delivery, I can’t believe Abel and Phoenix are almost 3 now. I think he was a little upset when he realised that I’d given birth to two little versions of myself. The boys are my little mini-mes.
Now Delilah is 15 months. She’s so much like her dad it scares me, the same smile, the same laugh, the same jet black hair and huge green eyes. He loved the boys to death, but he worshiped the ground she walked on. His little princess, I was his queen, the boys were his princes.
But now it’s just me and my children. Nathaniel’s gone. I don’t actually think I would have made it without my kids to force me to keep going. I felt completely empty most days, I just cried and moped around. You aren’t meant to loose your husband, not ever! But I did at 20! How was that fair!
i was only a few months along when he died, he’s a twin himself, so was his grandma. Twins run in the family but I never thought I’d be having two sets.
Im actually two and a half week past my due date. I’m going to be induced at hospital in the morning. 16 hours and I’m going to be a 21 year old widowed mum off 5.
My sister AND best friend have just come down with bloody covid! I’m originally from Australia so all my family is half way round the world. My god mother, Aunt Lelia and my cousin have all just hopped onto a plane but they won’t be here on time. I have to be induced 7 o’clock on the dot!
im going to be all alone as I give birth. No Nathaniel, no family, giving birth alone in the hospital my husband was pronounced dead at. I'm terrified. Absolutely terrified. But I have to stay strong. I keep telling myself that: I need to stay strong. And I do! But I’ve got no clue on what’s going to happen.
I just want him so much. I just want him to kiss me and tell me everything is ok. Just wish my husband was here to fix things. But he isn’t and I can’t help but feel scared about every little thing. I can’t do this on my own. Why did he leave me here? Me and my kids. I just need him so bad.
Ivy
