May sound crazy !

Bitter sweet. These are the things that crop up to surprise us when we least expect. 

I so understand that longing to have my husband back that it's a physical feeling. 

Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

It’s not crazy at all, it’s those unexpected things that tip us over the edge. I found the top up card for Chris’ mobile in a handbag I clearly hadn’t used since last October and that made me sob. As for being behind a couple in the supermarket till who said ‘Let’s go for a coffee’…..well I sat in the car and wept. 
Sending hugs 

Jane

xx

I know how you all feel. My daughter is staying with me and we were discussing what to eat tomorrow. Without thinking I said there are some spaghetti bolognaises  in the freezer that your dad made.  I just burst in tears when I realised he wouldn’t be making anymore! Not sure I want to eat them tomorrow now.

Julie x

Its things like that that put it into perspective.  I had to put Robs clothes away when he came back home for palliative care as I didn’t have room for the rail in the bedroom with the hospital bed going in, i opened the suitcase the other day and got upset. so many memories and of course they smelt of him.

Went to storage the other day to sort out and still can’t find his wedding ring and watches which he never wore.  I know i’ll find them whenever i find my new home and our life comes out of storage but i wanted them now and have his wedding ring made smaller for me to wear.

Morning all, 

Just a little thought.

I have been sorting clothes, Rob's and mine too, shuffling wardrobes, I smile, my 3 wardrobes his 1.

I came across Rob's big towelling dressing gown, he had it years, but he wasn't a dressing gown person, up and dressed every day, even the 11 weeks he was home on end of life care he got dressed and came down the stairs, hard to believe, the day he died was the day we ordered the bed for downstairs. Never needed it.

Sorry rambling again, the point of this message was to say last night and this morning I wore his dressing down, I am very much a dressing gown person.

It's big, fluffy and felt lovely and I didn't cry, but it is now 9 months since Rob died,  I do believe I need to see signs that I am doing ok and this is one.

Take care everyone 

Donna

I think that you're spot on. Part of the healing is being able to embrace the memory and cherish it without crumbling down. I took my daughters to a classical concert yesterday of films soundtracks. Juliette would have loved it and of course it's family films we've all watched together a thousand times. I had tears in my eyes because she would have loved it, then I looked at my daughters who were having a brilliant time, and thought, that's where her legacy is. She doesn't need to be physically with us anymore, she is with us all the time. She made the girls who they are. She made me who I am. That's something good to hold to.

Take care everyone.

Antoine