Hi everyone,
I thought I would come on here today and catch up on all the posts and also write a post about how I have been getting on.
My uncle left for Germany one week and two days ago. Just as I am writing this now I am thinking: Really? Has it really only been one week since he left?
I am slowly getting back into my life here. The first couple of days weren't easy at all and, as I had anticipated, I felt very alone and very low, even to the point of asking myself: What is it all about? What is the point of it all? Is this going to be my life from now on? And do I want this life?
I think those questions were triggered by the fact that:
1. I have not much work yet;
2. I have to build up my social life again, become a part of the community again;
3. I am on my own for the first time in 18 months.
Chats with two wonderful friends have helped me to remember that I can use affirmations/short sentences to make me feel better along the lines of:
1. I am feeling alone right now but I can always change this situation.
2. I have everything I need.
3. I am good with everything I am.
Those sentences help me when I read them frequently to stop my mind that is thinking about what is difficult about my situation right now. When I stop my mind from going into overdrive, I can see that of course it'll all take time, I have only been back since the 4th August and for the first week it was more like a holiday and it's only during this past week that I have had time to do things for my business and my social life/life in the community. And of course it isn't all that nice for me to live on my own again all of a sudden, especially because I am a person who likes having people around her all the time, but there are good things about it too. And, above all: This is the way my life is now. And it isn't a bad life at all.
I think that I am a person who only feels good in herself when either work is extremely busy or I have a very busy social life. And at the moment I don't have either and that is hard for me. But it'll change of course. It'll just take time.
I have found two therapy clinics to work from. And, even though I have only two clients so far, I have booked the places from next week onwards. I am doing a lot of advertising my therapies and workshops in the hope that I will be able to build a solid client base in no time. I am doing marketing courses and some courses with Marisa Peer, the famous hypnotherapist from the UK, at the moment to build up confidence and the belief that an abundant life is possible.
I have met up with all of my friends at this stage, of course with keeping distance and being careful, mostly for walks and in one case sitting in my house with the front door wide open.
Today is my first day alone, the first day for which I haven't made any plans. I thought it would feel unpleasant, but actually it doesn't, I have plenty of time to give the house a good clean and to check all my emails and things.
Lots of love
Mel
