I lost my partner 3 weeks ago after nursing him through mouth and throat cancer over the last 6 months at home. The funeral was yesterday. I feel bereft, exhausted and empty. I cling onto the love we had and the many good times but am haunted by the difficult and frightening symptoms we had to deal with (especially with Covid). I learned to flush his PICC, dress the fungating tumour, provide meds and food through a GNT and later a RIG. I can’t get some of those images out of my mind. Has anyone else had a similar experience? I haven’t been able to discuss this aspect with family and friends.
We have no control over some of the outcomes - that’s the hard bit. But we gave all our love and all tried to everything which was in our power- that’s all we could do and we should celebrate the challenges we met. It’s such an unbelievably hard journey to take for our lovely partners and for those who walk closely next to them xx
Kikko thanks for your message, I can't help the way I feel, his family completely disrespected myself and my husband by stating that I was not wanted at the hospital nor was I wanted at the funeral, , they never respected any of Peter's wishes, it should have been me not him in the casket
