I really don't want to continue with my life as it is, losing Les was hard enough at the time but i feel totally depressed and feeling i shouldn't carry on with out her by my side. i go to bed worrying about the next day wake up not wanting to get up laying in bed until 10-11-12 am i cant go back to work and i have nothing to look forward to in my life. i wake up knowing i'm by myself after 28 years it feels nothing can help. my home is not mine after all this time worrying about the things we shouldn't. her whispers at night are gone and her laughter too. i'm crying all the time and thinking of the what if's before the cancer i've looked at all the holiday pics that just makes things worse for me. i bought some angel cards wanting to get answers as Les didn't leave a letter before she died explaining anything she had done before the cancer took her. I'm in limbo not knowing, things just don't seem real i'm totally alone. like a ship going out of the harbour and never returning. i'm empty inside my head is loss just need to feel something.......... positive .......... she was the foundation of the family and it feels like its falling down around me
