19 months on

Hi Cherelann

I am 15months down the line and i have had this for the last few weeks going over everything, day by day.

I have felt worse than i did at the start, thought i was  coping rather well, i have been in touch with the Hospice my hubby was in and asked for counselling,  as i felt i could not go on feeling like this, i am glad i made the phone call, i felt relived as i got a lot out of my mind instead of keep going over it.

I did try to tell my children how i was feeling but i truly do not think  they realise it is different for them, yes it was there dad,

L

Ike you we where married 53 years he was the other half of me, i fill lost, do not know who ellie is, was always the two of us i was 16 when we meet.

I have got to find myself and take him with me in what ever i may do.

Take Care Ellie x

Hi Ellie, I totally get what you are saying. I have two lovely daughters but having lost my parents, It’s traumatic but it’s so different when you lose your life partner.  I don’t think they get what it is like, and perhaps nobody can unless it happens to them.As you say it’s hard to find  yourself as a single person after so long together. Thank you for understanding xxxx

Hi it is also 19 months since my wife died. I find it nearly as hard now as it was then. I also have been thinking about her last few weeks, I never realised that you could miss someone so much. , and the loneliness is just horrendous. It is hard to understand being with someone for 44 years and then nothing. Sometimes I still expect her to walk in the door. 
Mike. 

Hi Winmick, I think it’s as hard as when our loved ones died. I don’t think others  who haven’t gone through this get this. I agree the loneliness is horrendous as you say. I still can’t believe this has happened and have thought about this so much more lately. Thinking of you and your lovely wife xxx 

Hi there, yes I do know the feeling that, out of the blue with no warning, these very specific memories come in and stay with us for a couple of minutes, hours or even days in all their sharpness. Please know that you can write here all the time. Lots of love, Mel

Dear Cherelan you're not alone lovely lady. Im just over 18months from losing my sweet Anne. Married and the only love of my life for 50yrs. I too have recently  broken down and in pieces over the memories that kept flooding in. Taking Anne  to her beloved M&S and me kissing the back of her neck whilst she inspected some goods. I always got told off for doing that but chuckled and never stopped the  habit. And memories of just how strong that incredible woman was coping with knowing she would pass over within the next 6 - 15months. We all tread a lonely and sad path Im afraid Cherelan. Take good care of yourself. 

Geoff x

Just over 18 months for me some days I can think of my wife and smile mostly I start to crack which is very hard at work I have found I miss her more just lately I don't think you ever get over this but learn to live with it as best you can 

Thank you Mel x

Hi Geoff, it’s good to know that there are others who understand. X