Just me on cards??

Writing the Christmas cards felt just the same- it just brought all the pain of being ‘just me’ to the surface- not that it's ever far away. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to be just me. Today I was going through a box of photo albums that my sons had brought down from the loft. I coped fairly well with looking through some of the photos of the last 46 years of my life but what really got me was finding two of my diaries from the year we got engaged and the year we got married. I’d no idea I still had them. No need to explain what it was like to read the thoughts of that 20 year old me who couldn’t believe how lucky she was. 
Sending hugs xx

I’m so sorry. That must have been heartbreaking. 

I was going through a box of my husbands bits and bobs recently and found something he had kept from me on our first wedding anniversary. As it was ‘paper’ I had written him a poem and never knew he had kept it all this time.

So sad but at the same time made my heart swell with love for him. True love will last forever ️ 

It will and we’ve been so lucky to experience it. It’s what makes this so flipping hard and painful x

Bramblejoo, I found going through these admin tasks hard and upsetting too (my wife died 3 months ago) . In the end I did them a few at a time stretched over weeks.

Signing cards is something I've thought about. . . I have a friend who, when his wife died, signed all his cards with his name and his dog's so that he wasn't signing alone. That physical act of leaving out your partner is hard and I told everyone I wasn't sending Christmas cards this year (I wasn't in a good state anyway). Perhaps you could mention your partner as an aside on the card for now? Perhaps saying how much they would have loved the occasion or enjoyed their company? That way you acknowledge them but perhaps also acknowledge your situation by signing just for yourself? Just a suggestion - still not sure what I'm going to do for birthdays coming up this month.

One upsetting moment for me was filling in my new diary front pages: Name,address etc. When I got to the 'Contact in Emergency' section I just crumpled.

Like you say, 'it just grabs you when you're least expecting it . . .'

I hadn’t even thought of emergency contact! I have stepchildren, one of whom I see almost daily so I guess I’ll put her down when I get to that part...