What is your blanket

Hi Rolf

I've been on various antidepressants even before my husband was ill and now on Venlaxafine. Was on 300mg but have been getting hot flushes and night sweats so reduced to 225mgs which hopefully helps. It is a known side effect but not one that's easy to cope with. 

Ironically it's used to help women with the menopause!

Hi wildcat I'm on injections for prostate cancer they also give you night sweats they are not very nice primrose oil is supposed to help I tried antidepressants but sleep to deep and as with the prostate need to get up a few times in the night so had to stop taking them hope they stop for you 

Hi everyone,

I am coming in on this conversation late because I have really been thinking about the question what my blanket is. I actually think I have a few:

Firstly, there is my work of which, unfortunately, there is very little at the moment which makes me realise all the more how important work has become for me. There was a time, during Paul's illness particularly in the last couple of months of his life, where I really hated work, didn't want to go to work, wanted to have all the time with him, and when the time came that Paul was forgetting to take his Methadone for pain relief (the pain was unrelated to the cancer by the way), I felt I needed to be at home to remind him to take it (8 ml in the morning, 8 ml at night and twice break-through medication of 2mg during the day). But now that I am on my own I can really see that I need my work. When I don't have work, I don't really know what to do with myself and feel less good about life. Well, I can be okay for a day or two without work but after that it becomes really a struggle to keep my spirits up. Monday of this week I had two clients and I felt really good, almost happy, but yesterday and today I had no work and tonight I really felt like going to bed early and kind of pointless and anxious about the future. So work is definitely one of those blankets for me.

The second blanket is serving. As long as I can do something for others, anything at all, I feel good and useful and therefore well. But when nobody "needs me" - and I know this sounds terrible -, I feel easily down. I guess that's why I am so eager to work in a hospital setting or hospice setting as well, somewhere where it really matters and where my skills are really needed.

The third blanket is sleep. I know that many of you don't sleep well and are dreading the nights. I have never had a problem sleeping since Paul died. There are days when I can't wait to go to bed. This doesn't mean that I go to bed very early - I never go to bed bbefore 10PM - but I do feel a relief quite often once I am in bed because I know that, whatever else has been going on that day or in my head, whatever memories I have had to deal with, no matter how much I have missed Paul during the day, when I go to bed I can close my eyes, switch on an audio book to listen to while I go to sleep and know that tomorrow is another day and it will hopefully be better than this one.

I hope everyone is okay tonight and wish everybody a good night's sleep.

Love, Mel.