6 months on plus!

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Dear all

After a horrendous full day of guilt, uncontrollable tears and remorse the following day was so peaceful. I went about that day very efficiently and my mind and emotions had come to a complete stand still.I even went to bed with a quiet mind. Most odd ? The following day I operated as if life was back to normal. I went out with a recent widower friend to our normal fish and chip lunch at a brilliant fish and chip restaurant. I was buzzing. Even celebrated that same night Britains exit celebrations at 11pm along with more than enough alcohol. And that's how I am now at this very moment at 12 midnight. BUT I KNOW this is nature giving me a respite.A rest. Allowing my energy to recharge before the next bout of grief kicks in along with tears and all the rest of it. This seems the pattern of grief. Have any of you good folk experienced the same?

Love and Light

Geoff

AliG55 over 4 years ago

Morning Geoff,

Hope you are not too hungover this morning? Doesn't it feel good when you have a 'normal' day with laughing and enjoyment, really makes you feel lighter.

I had a good day at work yesterday, my first full shift 9-6. Even spoke about Mark to customers with no tears. Had a laugh with some if the lads.

But oh how I changed when I walked through the door, don't know why, maybe tiredness, but I was a mess and ended up crying myself to sleep, which I haven't done since he died. I always have a little cry at bedtime as he's not there to put my cold feet on! But last night was proper sobbing. My eyes are so sore this morning! Friends are taking me for brunch today so goodness knows what I'm going to look like lol.

I hope we all have a 'good' day today.

Love Ali xx

Newb over 4 years ago

For 3days I was in tears heart being squeezed gut wringing yesterday I woke up and thought I can't keep going like this and a calm came over me I also told her she should move on as I can't yes Geoff I think nature gives us a break or we would just pass ourselves

Ian

MelanieL over 4 years ago

Good morning Jeff,

Yes I have experienced similar situations many times. One day I would be in bits, crying my eyes out, wishing it were all different or even, in the beginning, wishing my own life would end, only to feel calm, peaceful, even something like content the following day. I sometimes feel that the bouts of grief and pain are necessary to be worked through and act like a release or relief of pressure and that therefore we can feel a little better and lighter for a short while afterwards. It's really interesting isn't it?

I am glad you had a good day and night and that you don't feel too hung over this morning!

Love, Mel.

I don't like the term "moving on" because it sounds to me like we are leaving our loved ones and the life we had with them behind. I like the term "moving forward" as it implies that, while life goes on, our loved ones are still with us in our hearts and minds.

FormerMember over 4 years ago in reply to MelanieL

Hi Geoff & everyone who has been replying to you today,I totally echo the sentiments of you all,one day in the depths of despair next day out shopping,having lunch with friends & having the odd laugh.I can only describe it as my waves of grief which ebb & flow on a day to day basis just now (8 weeks since I lost my husband Micky) I think we just have to go with it & when we have a bad day try to remember it can be peppered with goodish days too.

Love & thoughts to you all

Laura x

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