I give up

Hi Peter,

Remember that feelings change. If you hang in there for a little longer, you will feel ever so slightly different again. It is the nature of feelings to change. Perhaps give the Samaritans a call. They are people who don't know you but who listen to you and who help you to find answers to the questions you so desperately ask yourself. By talking to them you will find answers within yourself. I know it. Please don't give up on this group and on your life. She wouldn't want that.

Love, Mel.

Hi

I lost my husband to cancer 14 months ago. I’m not going to pretend it gets easier, but it does, even though you don’t want it to. I have so many “bed days” even now, I miss him so much. I thought several times about ending it all, it would be so easy, but I’ve carried on. I miss talking to him and just hanging out with him. Can’t honestly believe he’s gone. Life is for living and you should try to too. Message me back anytime, we all know where you are and the pain you are feeling xx

Thank you for everybodys kind words and messages my thoughts are with you all too .i am going to stay in this group.its 5am and just sat with my thoughts and taking one day at a time x

Hello ,

I lost my husband 3 weeks ago, my family' have been of poor support they just don't get it. We have not lost anyone and dealing with losing is so hard. They have all told me what I should do because they think they know. In today world they could look up on the internet how to support someone during times of grief. I am so angry it's helped me to clean my dishes yesterday . It was good to get angry as I was able to sleep for a few hours. I have medication off the doctor's to help with my new found anxiety which is very scary. We are strangers but we do understand. My husband's funeral if tomorrow , I don't want to hold a funeral for him. I never want to let him go. We met when I was 15 and he was 16. He is the only man I have ever loved as a husband.. he was our world.l can't see the point in life too.. you and your wife were so lucky to have found each other , they greif you are feeling is because of the love you had. A great love that some people never get to find at all. Hang on to the bond you have to help you now. My husband did not believe in life after death but we have had lots of signs in the past three weeks some of it must be him. I know what you mean about the same old messages on this site sometimes I look for help on the internet to find something for me. I talk a lot on the phone to my cousin who lost her dad. She found that family can be insensitive without thinking. Maybe we expect too much from them I nearly told all of mine where to go

 They just don't get it.

Morning Peter

I'm so glad you made the right decision and are staying with us, with unfortunately so many people on this site in the same position as you it can only help you to bring your thoughts and feelings to the fore and discuss them with us.

We all have something in common in that we have lost a dear one and miss them dearly but Peter I say this to honestly time is a great healer and gradually you will feel a bit better, you won't forget your Lindsay and I hope you don't but the memories you made during your time together will last a lifetime and in time you maybe able to make new ones but they will never replace the ones you made with Lindsay. Live with the good memories they will keep you going.

Take all the help you can whether it be here, from your GP or at a bereavement group, people are willing to help you and I have offered to help you find a support group where you can talk with others and I will help you find one if you'll let me.

It is important that you keep talking to us tell us your feelings and what you've been up to. It helps us to know a little bit about you.

Please let me help you either in this open forum or if you prefer by sending me private messages - it really is good to talk and you can talk with me at anytime I promise never to judge you but to be available to listen to you.

If the sun's shining in your area go out for a walk say hello to people the smile you'll get back will brighten up your day.

Please keep talking, you know it makes sense.

Best wishes

Ian

Thanks ian

Im a sorry for your loss i really really am my thoughts go out to you...my family all turned there back on me ,,my dad told me too man up and my sister mom n inlaws just stopped replying when i reached out for support ,,your right nobody understands how you feel ...what i can say is when people turn there back on you which in my case everyone did it makes you strong ,,i have one friend atm and my cat ...and i tell my friend if you see any of my family in asda or tesco and they ask after me tell them im doing great, ,,even tho im not doing great ...after my wifes funeral which i didnt want ...everyone went back to a function room and ppl where eating drinking talking about them selfs not one of them talked about my wife and i left the wake because that day i couldnt understand how people can eat or drink and talk about up coming holidays ...i try take my anger out by using a punch bag but am so drained that most the time i just sit with my cat and watch youtube .i think my cat is the only one who senses my emotions and my two teddy bears ....as i said i am so sorry for you loss please message me anytime my thoughts are with you and sending love x