Partner passed away on a break before starting chemo

 Diane39 I don't know how you feel but can you try and go step by step. If work helps do it? If not, rest. It sounds really bad what you have been through but you reached out on here. That is a big step in itself. So very sorry.

Thank you scarlet, I’ve come on here because really struggling talking to family and friends as there’s struggling to I don’t want to make them worry about me more, plus I struggle talking, I’m trying one step at a time but feel like I have a good day then go backwards, 

it's a good idea but also true friemds will be there 

Hi there, my husband passed on the 4th August from kidney cancer. Originally, I was on the Carer’s Forum and moved to the Bereaved Spouses Forum. I can honestly say, these Forum’s have helped we get through the most difficult year of my life. The support, understanding and non judgement have given me an opportunity to express my true emotions. Five months later, I am starting to feel more like me and am coping better. The approach I took was to not hold my emotions in. I did lots of research on grief and how to survive. The Cruse Bereavement website was very helpful, and reassured me that I wasn’t going bonkers. Sending hugs and kindness. Kate. Xxx

Hi Kate , it’s does feel like I’m going bonkers at time, I think I may have to do the same and look into it, just to understand more, it’s the night times that I struggle most with,  just can’t relax so can’t sleep, if I fall asleep I wake with a jump, like being hit it the face that it’s all real, 

I understand. Night time is when you are trying to relax enough to be able to sleep. That is almost impossible, as your brain is trying to process the loss. So you have shock, exhaustion, and extreme grief. I needed to make sense of it all, and try to find a way through. Sending you  hugs and kindness. Kate. Xxx