My Dad passed last week of lung cancer. He was a horrible Dad that resulting in me self harming most my childhood and suicide attempts in my teens. With Therapy for mental health etc over the years now 50. We put it past us and the last 10 years or so got on well. Now the funeral is being arranged i obviously don't want it brought up. But I do not have the same feelings as they do. Me and my mother were the ones abused my sister was treated like his angel. My mother denies it ever happened even to me. Non of his friends new how abusive he was and I'm dreading having to be at the Funeral lying to get through it. My Mother hated him most her life but now seems to have only wonderful memories. Has anyone been in similar place?
Hi Max2024 welcome to the forum. You are very forgiving even thinking of going to the funeral so dont be so hard on yourself, many people wouldn't even consider going so thats the first thing to say. Can you sit out of sight at the funeral or slip away quietly after the service is past? Would that help any?
Families are strange beasts and the general consensus seems to be that everyone gets along nicely, but we both know that that is not the case all for many. You need to be mindful of you and your own mental health in this situation and do what is right for you and not what others expect from you if that makes sense?.
gail
