Grieving my dad and I'm broken

1. Hi there I am so sorry for your loss of your dad. I lost my dad 18 months ago and I totally understand how you feel. I still get so sad and I think this will always stay with me. I agree that I don’t think people can understand unless they have witnessed that awful decline and those final days. Sending you lots of love. You are not alone xxx

I'm so so sorry for your loss. I totally understand your pain&how you're feeling right now. I lost my lovely Dad 10 weeks ago....it still doesn't feel real. My heart actually hurts and it really is a physical pain. I agree, until you've experienced this you cannot understand. Welcome to the club no one wants to be in. Our Dad's are  our first loves, our hero's, our role models.....

I'm sending you lots of love and strength...when it really gets too much just take it an hour, or even a minute at a time. Look after yourself and your family. Make your Dad proud. Xxx

I'm so sorry for your loss, I lost my daddy last year on the 9th of March. I'm still a complete mess, I hide it well now from my family. This year, when the hours were getting closer to his time of death, I could not breath, I was right back there in that moment. I've also lost my mum to cancer 6 years. 

It's weird to live your life without your parents. I was one 100% a daddies girl and I don't think I will ever get over it. I came to macmillan and this community. I used to be here daily, now I come on my really bad days. I read everyone's comments and loss myself for a couple of minutes, even hours. I don't always comment or reply but honestly use this space for yourself. My family don't know I'm on here. Hope you can find some comfort from here. Sending big cuddles. X

Sorry for your loss, I too totally understand how you are feeling, I lost my beautiful dad 4 weeks ago just 13 days after he was diagnosed with Lung cancer.

sending lots of love xxx

I am so sorry to hear about your Dad 

we lost my step dad on March 8th after having secondary cancer from September. 
It’s the hardest thing to process and go through with. 
I am struggling a lot and so is my mum. 

I understand how you feel .. I have helped my mum look Care for him since December till he passed. You go from doing everything and seeing so many professionals and having Mary Ann Evans etc in your house day in day out - to nothing. 

I have been struggling to want to mix at the min as just want to be with my mum sister etc 

I have never felt pain like it and we still have the funeral to batttle on the 5th April. 

Here if you ever need to chat 

Rachel x

It's sad to read that you've all lost someone. Sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing, it makes me feel less alone.

I know what you mean, people don't really understand unless they've lost someone. I used to be one of those people, I would be sympathetic but didn't really understand how horrendous it is to lose a parent. 

My dad is currently in hospice for end of life care. I'm on autopilot at the moment, it feels like I'm in a bad dream and it's not real. I know I'm going to lose him in a few days/weeks. 

I bumped into an elderly neighbour who was out walking her dog on Sunday evening, I don't see her that often, probably once every couple of months cos our schedules are different. It was perfect timing, I needed to hear her wise words. She's probably in her late 60s and has lost a lot of family and relatives. She lost her grandad when she was in her 20s, he was like a father figure in her life, she had a massive breakdown at work (this was over 40 years ago and people weren't so into mental health) . She somehow managed to get herself out from this depressing place because she knew her grandad didn't want her to be unhappy, he would have wanted her to have a good life. She frankly told me she still misses him and she still hasn't gotten over it and said it still upsets her now.  That was refreshing to hear cos people tend to say "time will heal the wounds, you'll get over it" or something along those lines. She told me to stay strong, remember that my dad would want me to be happy. 

I know when the time comes, grief will hit me hard and I somehow have to find a way to work through my emotions, similar to my wise neighbour. I'm ary the hospice, I've read a leaflet about bereavement counselling, I've made a note of it for future reference...Cruise Bereavement Care and Good Grief Trust. I haven't googled them, at least I know there'll be someone to talk to if I really can't cope.

Take care everyone and take your time to process your emotions. This forum is great for letting it out rather than bottling up your emotions.

I'm so sorry to hear this.  My Dad died In July last year after a short illness with Liver Cancer. We were with him when He died. I found the anticipatory grief so hard, felt like I was grieving hard before he died. I know this part is so hard, like you're braced for impact, you know its going to happen but don't know when. Take care. X

Sending love. It's a common thread here, until you go through it you don't know how it feels. It's so true. My Dad died last July. Time doesn't heal grief but you learn to live with it. I went straight to bereavement counselling. I had to dump my feelings somehwere.  I also now go to Maggie's bereavement support group which is helpful because even though everyone's grief is different there's a common ground and everyone just gets it. I'd also recommend a book by Cariad Lloyd - you are not alone. It's excellent to help make sense of your grief.  Take care. I get it. X