The pain is not going away

Hi, I lost my Dad to liver cancer 4 days ago. I managed to get back in time having just travelled back home with my family for them to say their last goodbyes. He died at home after a quick decline.  He was diagnosed in January and it has only taken 7 months. I watched his final moments and whilst I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else I found it harrowing and it plays out in my hear. Everything is raw. I miss him so much.  He wanted to see my daughter got to Cambridge uni in the autumn.  We feel cheated. I know so many people go through this but its so painful. I'm sorry to everyone going through this.  X

Hi Gwep,

I'm sorry for your loss. Its so painful and there's so much anger at having future moments with loved ones ripped away from us.

I lost my mum just over a year ago. 17 weeks from diagnosis to passing.  It does start to feel easier though, I promise. Like they say, grief isn't linear, so I'll still find myself randomly bursting into tears at the thought of her. But, as time goes on, I find myself missing her the same but dealing with it with more peace and acceptance. 

It's still very, very raw for you so you're probably a bit all-over-the-place right now, but finding your way the 'new normal' is the biggest challenge of grief I think.

One day at a time and give yourself permission to feel and react however you want. Bottling it up leads to a breakdown (trust me!!) so just go with your emotions. 

I wish you luck and comfort in the days, weeks and months ahead. Xx

Yes it's hard. I'm 7 weeks on from losing my darling husband and it hurts like hell. I find the mornings so hard and wonder what I have to get out of bed for now but I do anyway. I find it very hard to comprehend that he is not here anymore he was my best friend and soulmate for 40 years. So many things happening that he's not here to see now. I'm slowly but surely getting rid of some things around the house that reminded me of his illness but not his clothes just yet. Some aids that got installed when he got really ill and his mobility began to get affected can't be moved like handrails fitted to doorframes and the wall so unfortunately they are a constant reminder there of him. Cancer is cruel, cruel disease I used to think it was really awful for people going through it but so much more awful when it lands on your doorstep. His was cured in January 2022 when they got rid of it all but it returned with a vegeance in May 2022 and decided this time it was taking him. I hope you can seek comfort in your family and loved ones in the coming days and send you best wishes.

xx