Our father passed away 19 days ago at the young age of 51 with poorly differentiated neuroendochrine cancer. This is a rare type of cancer which was terminal and has no cure. He deteriorated so fast and I can’t believe he’s gone. Coming from a religious family, we are struggling to understand why it’s the good ones God takes and makes suffer. He was in constant pain 24/7 and we had sleepless nights and we’re on edge 24/7. We gave up working, pushed weddings forwards, tried to create happy memories but the pain he was in was just unbearable and gave us so much grief to see him like that. A lot more needs to be done in NET research to find and diagnose earlier. I too am having nightmares and insomnia as all I can picture is dads face when he passed away and the moment we pushed his coffin to be cremated. I am the one sibling who tried stay strong and gets everyone through it and going back to work on Monday to see if it helps but our mum is completely broken too. It’s crazy but life really does carry on and it feels like I am seeing it through a different lens and seeing what really matters in life. We sorted through dads clothes and his belongings and was just so heartbreaking to do. I don’t know if I have made the right decision to go back but being alone with my thoughts just sends me spiralling down.
