Can't get over the loss of my mum

Hi

I am so sorry for your loss and the pain you are going through. I know how you feel with guilt. I lost my Dad 10 weeks tomorrow and his decline was rapid. Can I ask what type of cancer your Mum had? You mentioned low sodium levels and my Dad was also hospitalised with that a couple of times due to his cancer, which was Small Cell Lung Cancer.

We were very naive when I think back now, my Dad really suffered the last few weeks, he couldn’t swallow, he couldn’t eat, he didn’t have the energy to get to the toilet quick enough but we all thought it was from his treatment, but it was his cancer progressing. I feel guilty because we all kept saying to him “try and eat more” or “have a walk round the garden to strengthen your legs” but he physically couldn’t but we just didn’t believe we were going to lose him so quickly. He was diagnosed in June 2021 but his decline was rapid from mid January and we lost him on 8th Feb. 

All I am doing is day to day. I have sad days, guilt days, better days etc they’re all different and I cry everyday, I miss him so much it hurts. Try and not focus on the things you feel bad about, you looked after your Mum and was with her when she passed, I hope you can take some comfort from those when you are ready but don’t beat yourself up, I’m sure your Mum would be very proud of you. 

x

I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is devastating. Please try not to beat yourself up for anything you said when you were hoping that mum would recover - you were hopeful and she knew that. I’m sure you loved each other very much, and you were there with her and she will have felt loved. Give yourself time to grieve and cry all you need to. Sending strength x

My mum had endometrial cancer, thanks for your kind words, I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face 

Thanks for your kind words, it's so hard as I'm so alone and miss her so much 

Hi. I am so sorry for your loss. I honestly know exactly how your feeling, my mum was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer in November 2020, and then passed away in July 2021. She went downhill so fast I still can’t get over her not being here anymore. Try not to let feelings build up, talk to somebody. I made that mistake and I’m still struggling as I have only just joined here. I am always around if you need to chat. Xx

I just thought I'd got so much longer with mum, she was going to start a different chemo, but she just declined in the blink of an eye, and actually passed of sepsis and kidney failure. 

I just feel so alone as I have no family left now. 

Sorry for your loss too xx

Honestly I know exactly how you feel. My mum had 4 rounds of chemo and immuno. She had a fall at the beginning of July, was taken into hospital and she was happy and chatty, I spoke to her consultant and they said the cancer hadn’t spread or grown so they wasn’t worried at all. She came home on the Friday, and then went to Phyllis Tuckwell for a bit of rehab on the Saturday. When I saw her on the Sunday she was a bit confused but she will still herself. Then by early hours of the Tuesday morning we got the call to say she had taken a turn for the worse so we went straight down there and within half hour of me my dad and sister being there she passed away, which we found out was because she had a chest infection that the hospital hasn’t picked up on. I always feel alone. I have my partner here but he still has his parents, so he has no idea how I feel. I always feel alone. As I said I am always here if you want a chat, it’s nice to talk to someone that’s going through the same thing xx 

I can relate to how you feel on many levels.  How are you currently?