It's nearly 4 months since I've lost my mum.
I'm coping ok but getting closer to Christmas I know I'm acting a little different. The sale of her house is nearly completed and that make me feel a little lost. I lost my dad 9 years previous and it isn't our family home but with both of them gone I feel as if my childhood has gone. I found out my brother is seeing a councillor which surprised me but makes me think should I be talking to someone?
I'm not a talker, I'm a listener. I think what would I even be able to talk about with a stranger, what will they ask me. What if it opens the floodgates and I can't carry on with day-to-day life. I have a 3 year old and no one can support me with her.
I'm numb still looking at photos, I'm overwhelmed and I'm struggling with my memory.
What are people's experience of it? How did you know if you were ready or even needed help?
Hi , in terms of my wife's cancer my finally drove me to ask for help was that sense of being overwhelmed after her second collapsed lung - and I sat/talked/cried with a complete stranger for about an hour. They helped me realise I had to take some time for me.
Two groups we often talk about on here are Cruse Bereavement Care and the loss foundation. Howwever there is no right was to grieve so it is important you consider what is right for you.
We were very lucky with our son that a very good friends really helped look after our son, but I was always there.
I know "firsts" after we lost my parents were a challenge and when we saw people enjoying life it can be difficult - moving on though I can now look back and think - wow my parents achieved a lot, not least in making me the person I am.
To me that seems a bit of a wander mixing my wife and my parents - I hope that is more helpful rather than confusing and perhaps that is because the whole process is complex.
<<hugs>>
Steve
