Passing Away

1 minute read time.

My mum passed away this afternoon.  It was very peaceful in the end. She had wanted to be buried on the same day and wanted a simple ceremony. 

I reflect on the last few months and I struggle to believe any of it.  I can't imagine my life without my mum as a big part of it. 

While we were burying her this evening, I kept thinking about what the Macmillan nurse said to me a few weeks ago when she told me that there was nothing they could do and that my mum was going to die.  And I felt very angry.  I felt angry that they would let my mum suffer for months on end and then let her die.  I know that nothing is going to bring her back now, but I just felt that it was pathetic that nothing could be done in this day and age.  If I have a medical problem, I expect it to be sorted out.  I don't expect to be told 'nothing can be done'.  This doesn't seem good enough to me at all. 

I know that I'm emotional at the moment and that my thoughts are probably not logical.  I hope that time will help our family come to terms with what has happened. 

Sorry for the rant, but I just wanted to share.

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hello Yilmaz - I just wanted to say that I am sorry that you have lost your mother and to extend my sympathies to you and your family.

    When someone I love has died I have always been able to gain comfort from the fact that they are no longer in pain or suffering.

    You are angry because nothing could be done for your mother - she was beyond help.  Again perhaps you could draw comfort from the fact that the surgeons and doctors did not pull her about in order to try and save her life - maybe prolong it for a short while but causing great pain and trauma in so doing. They accepted the situation and left her in peace.  May peace be with you. Hugs - Girl Friday xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    hi Yilmaz, please accept my deepest condolences on the loss of your mum....heaven knows howw i would feel if it were my mum. Your feelings are totally normal, you have lost  one of the most important people in your life, vent your feelings as much as you like , dont bottle them up cos we know what champayne bottles do when they explode. please take care of yourself

    hugs and kisses   sue   xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    I agree with Girl Friday in that your Mum is not going to suffer pain and indignity anymore. But this still doesn't alter the fact you have had a massive loss to your life, so allow yourself time to grieve and have all the feelings you have without feeling guilty in any way.

    Look after yourself now, and in time the hurt will lessen.

    best wishes - Trudel

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    I am so very sorry for you loss. Thinking of you ...love Carol x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    My heartfelt sympathies Yil, to you and your family for the loss of your dear mum.  It has been a long road and you and mum,  and you have both travelled it with courage and grace.  I can understand your anger, its the worst thing when they say there is nothing they can do.  We can only hope that one day they do find a cure for this horrendous illness.  

    Hugs

    Nic xx