2011 nearly 2012 or is it Victorian Times?

3 minute read time.

FormerMember

31 Dec 2011

Tonight I am very angry, so angry I dont know where to start.

My husband was supposed to have a cafeter in yesterday, when I left today he still hadnt got one.

He was soaking wet and had been for some time when I got there. He is semi-awake, sometimes he trys to get a bottle but doesnt manage.

Because he is very uncomfortable to be moved around, he is naked lying on his bed with just a sheet over him. He is in and out of sleep,but trys to use a bottle, no curtains around because as I said hes not really with it.. He is in a 6 bedded ward! Where the hell is the Dignity in that? If he knew........

He did manage a couple of sentences today about the Dr telling him about his scan results and that its bad news,that the cancer is in his bones etc. and that if I was in before he went off Duty he would tell me too. I wish I hadnt told his own Dr not to tell him the implications of the raised calcium in his blood, his Dr. and I present would have been so much kinder.

Its a good job that my husbands lovely Dr explained all to me on Thursday before he went in an Ambulance to Hospital. I did not see the Dr at the hospital needless to say.

My husbands Dr had said that it would be safer for my husband to be in Hospital over the week-end as I wouldnt be able to contact anyone as its another Bank Holiday. If he was at home, he would be clean and dry.

I went to the Nurses desk,and said where is is the Dignity in that, that is not right. Its not fair on him or the other patients. Yes we know, this is the Dr you need to speak to, but she didnt know he needed one! She then told me this is the problem at week-ends there are only 2 Registras on for the whole of the Cancer Wards, they had to deal with the poorly ones first, and then get around to the ones like my husband.

I have even been asked today wether I will be having my husband home or will he be going into a Nursing Home. Hang on a minute, the roller coaster is going far too fast now, I am struggling to catch up. I was still hoping he was going to be able to walk out of there, be alright for a while and.......

I am writing this as its a New Years Eve that I know I will never forget. I am sitting at home with just me and the dogs, hoping so much that there will still be time to make some more happier memories.

This is 2011, very nearly 2012. What on earth happend to the sick and elderly being treated with Respect, Kindness, allowing them the Dignity they deserve. Nurses and Drs do not have the time because they are filling in forms, they are under staffed etc etc. Its wrong its so very wrong.

What ever happened to the basic principles of Nursing.

I am not sure that I should have put this on the general site, perhaps it should be on Carers site, but why are we all allowing this to happen. One Nurse said today, I would do it myselft if I could, but I cant,we have to wait for a Dr. My husband would have his dignity, he would be clean and dry .

My thoughts and best wishes to eveyone out there with cancer and their carers, on this New Years Eve.

respect xxxxx

FormerMember over 12 years ago

Thank you so much for comment, and I also know how to spell catheter now! I couldnt think how to spell it.

The least of my problems I feel.

LM's hugs are pretty effective, Welsh cwtches are also pretty good! Having witnessed your sparring I am not going to say which is better, I will keep that to myself!

Thank goodness for this web site, for without it I would have struggled even more tonight.

Bless you Colin.

xxxx
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FormerMember over 12 years ago

Hello Scraton

Thank you so much for your comments

Yes its my husbands GP I did't know him untill we went to see him after my husbands first x-ray. He has also treated me very well, for which I am very grateful.

I agree, mainly it isnt the Nurses fault, they are very busy, they do keep reminding the Drs. who are also very busy .

But, as you say it is the basis surely of all good nursing practice, or it used to be.

Love

Respect

xxxx
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FormerMember over 12 years ago

Respect, I'm so sad but not entirely surprised to read your post. Your poor husband deserves much better than this. To be kept clean and in a dignified state is basic nursing, not rocket science.

My Dad had the unfortune to be in hospital over Christmas. The nursing care has been alarming. I sat one evening for an hour listening to a patient's buzzer going off.....no one came. Another patient was moved into the ward in a confused state with his belongings thrown at the bottom of his bed. He was left like this....I eventually helped him to unpack and put things like his drinks where he could reach them.

The ward smelled foul and the floor was sticky (God knows what with).

Patients were buzzing to be taken to the toilet and were being ignored. This was (like your husband) a 6 bed ward. Another patient clearly couldn't feed himself very easily and yet meals were just plonked on a tray in front of him.

Dad had an oesophageal stent fitted. The day after it was fitted he buzzed for help to take him to the toilet (as he needed to be unhooked from a drip). The buzzer was ignored. For all the nurses knew, Dad's stent could have been bleeding. Thank God it wasn't as no one came for over an hour (we found out later).

After a stent is fitted it can be dangerous for a patient to eat solid food straight away. We had told each change of nurse (note nurse, not nurses in plural) that Dad MUST have a blended diet. The day after the stent was fitted, Dad was brought sandwiches......if he had attempted to eat them, the stent would have blocked instantly and he could have choked. He finally got a blended meal the day before he came home....it was the most disgusting smelling thing I've ever seen in my life. Our Macmillan nurse is extremely angry, she left instructions for a blended diet to be provided (her instructions were apparently lost). Mind you, after seeing a blended meal....

Mom and I ended up going twice a day to take him soups and custard.

He was also told quite bluntly by a doctor that they had only given him 24 hours to live when he was admitted. Dad was on his own when he was told this. He was also put on 'DNR' without the family being consulted. Mom had this removed from his records.

Once Dad was able to keep liquid down we were able to take him home. He's now recovering and working on building his strength up.

I'm so sorry that your husband has been treated like this - it's completely wrong. I don't care how understaffed the hospitals are over a holiday period, there should be a basic standard of care.

I hope that you get some answers as to why no one fitted a catheter. Has no one got any common sense????

Sending you lots of love and a massive hug.

xxxx Sarah xxxxxxx
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FormerMember over 12 years ago

Mine are best of course!

And have another one to help you through the night (((((((xxx))))))))))

Night night

xxx
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FormerMember over 12 years ago

Oh bless you Little MY,

You do know that someone will have to have his say now don't you?

I am desperatelt trying to sort my 2 dogs out at the moment! I let them out just at the wrong time when a firework went off. They along with cancer need stopping!

Hope you sleep well.

It is really amazing what those hugs do for you when needed the most, especially from you. You are a very generous lady! Nutty but lovely!

Take care Little My, I have everything crossed for you too, no wonder I keep falling over!

Do you know thanks to you all, I have almost ended this evenining sane!

Night night, sleep tight

xxxx
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