Monday 14th June 2010
John's looking good this morning. Tucked into a boiled egg and soldiers and planning a fish pie for dinner. He's dreading Thursday, because he's due for Chemo No. 4, but I've said that we must make the best of the next three days while he's feeling OK.
We have the pre-chemo tests tomorrow and I've arranged for my lovely neighbour to look after Gemma. Fingers crossed that…
Friday 11th June 2010
We've had a brilliant day today. The car was due for a service and my best friend Pat picked us up after we'd dropped it off. We went for a lovely pub lunch and John tucked into fish and chips and helped me eat a slice of cheesecake afterwards (good for him but not so good for me!).
Then we all took Gemma for a walk. The sun nearly came out and it was lovely and warm and we strolled across…
Tuesday 8th June 2010
John felt better today and offered to go shopping for some things I forgot to buy yesterday. I carefully wrote him out a shopping list and off he went.
John LOVES shopping and, even though he's not eating as much as he used to, he just cannot resist a bargain. When he was well, our freezer was always crammed to bursting. Since he's been poorly and not up to shopping much, I've been running…
Thursday, 3rd June 2010
John got so upset today. I have to take the dog out every day and he just didn't feel up to it and he cried. He said he felt like he was trapped inside his body and that it was rotting away. We had a big hug and cried together but, once again, I felt so helpless.
I knew it was because he's been feeling so rough the past few days, although today was slightly better, but I also knew that he…
Tuesday 2nd June 2010
I look at John sometimes and I wonder how much more pain he can take. It has been almost constant during the last five days and his face is grey. He was determined to come out in the sunshine this afternoon but he felt every bump in the road and I could see he was suffering.
The morphine isn't touching it and it's making him feel sick all the time. He won't let me phone the doctor because…
