i am so angry , if i dont get this off my chest , i may do something stupid ,how dare you treat us like tihs !!!!

3 minute read time.

Well i can not believe what my mother in law has done now , do i cry or do i punch someone or something i am so angry ,,

most of you prob know since ju,was diognosed she was a nightmare , treated me like dirt but i put up with it for him , sometimes it was so hard but i was always the better person, well at the funeral she told everyone i didnt care for him properly and he should have been in a hospice , well she had to leave as noone else believed a word she was saying,. i have no regrets over the way i cared for and loved ju ,i did everything possible , and was thier right till the end , and yet she still threw that in my face ,so i decided just to ignore her but said if kids wanted to see her that was fine , well came to scattering ju,s ashes i txt her and she refused to come , thank goodness i said, so she wanted a picture as a keepsake ,so me being nice person let her have it , not even a thankyou !!!, since then not one word from her , so we had tuesdays service in private , only me and the kids knew and one friend on here ,

well me and the kids have had a blissful family week (was meant to be our family holiday, booked before ju got poorly ) , so i was looking forward to this weekend , well thanx to my mother in law i now have 2 very very angry girls , i recieved a phone call just now to tell me jordan has put a very rude message on face book , my god i was shocked , but now i know why i understand !

My mother in law and julians ex girlfriend (of 18years ago ) have been putting pics of them both on their and making comments ,about how happy they were ect , and saying nasty things about me . but i dont know what as i deleted them both when ju died ,as they were giving me this shit then too ,and i couldnt cope with it , but my girls obviously still have their grandmother on thier ,and can see everything .so now understandably my girls are devastated , i cant repeat what jordan wrote but i was shocked , i have rung her and asked if shes ok , and whats up? but she being her has said its nothing for me to worry about ,i couldnt tell her i knew ,as she is trying to protect me ,so i just told her i love her very much and im here ,

now im left wanting to confront my mother in law , i dont give a shit about ju,s ex she has always been a spare part in our marriage , she has a screw loose , and i know without a doubt how much ju loved me , and what upsets me most is he would be devastated not just how his mum is treating me , but our children who have just lost their dad, how dare she !!!

i dont know how i feel now im very very angry, but i also want to cry the thought of my kids hurting anymore just breaks my heart , we have had such a nice healing week together and this has just ruined it , bloody woman , she better never turn up on my doorstep again, noone upsets my kids and gets away with it.

oh and i have written that on jordans facebook ,just so she can see it !!!!!!!!!!!

i wish she could see we are grieving, not bitter and twisted like she is ,,,,

all i can say is im very lucky ju was nothing like his mother, and neither are our kids , they are amazing ,strong and a credit to their dad xxxx

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Well i feel better now, been for long fast drive, very loud music , (no kids ) ,, i was very tearful to begin with, but pardon my language , *fu** her, , im now back ,taken deep breath and your comments as strength ,and am organizing a charity day for Macmillan in ju,s name in Aug huge footy matches of course , ive been meaning to start for ages .well now is a good time ,

    oh and funnily his ex asked if i was going to be their !!!!! yes im his wife ,but will be interesting seeing as her husband is one of the players :) . but this is about my hubby so she can sod off and take my mil with her ,may they be very happy together .

    FIGHTING SPIRIT IS BACK AGAIN :)

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Jenni,

    The best bit of advive I can give you,and its quite simple, Ignore the old Bag completely, She is suceeding getting under your skin and that is what makes her day. I know the way you protect your kids,and she will use that as your weak point to get you into the upset state that your in now.

    So Pal I know shes your childrens gran. Put that out of your mind. If she wants to see the kids reverse the role.  If she phones hang up if she calls at the door dont open it. Or you could Just phone her and tell her you dont want to have any contact with her,To keep away or you will get a restraining order from the police, for harassment and Mental

    stress. I know this is going to sound very extreme to

    you.But for you and the kids sake you will have to do something to stop it.

    Take care and be safe Big Hugs Love Sarsfield.XXX

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    so sorry to read about your experience, you and your children have enough to deal with without any added pressure, at the end of the day your mother in law will sit and reflect and realise shes not only lost her son but her grandchildren too.  She may be 'bad mouthing' you but sounds like she is bitter and twisted.  One day she will come to her senses and realise what a muppet she has been.

    wish you and your children love and peace at this very sad time xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Jenni,

    Oh that saying "you can't choose your family" is so true.  I am sorry and ashamed on her behalf for what she is doing but I ditto Sarsfield (for a change lol) in that you should IGNORE her, tell your children to just put her on hide on facebook, not delete because that will cause more confrontation but by hiding her she can't upset any of you and she doesn't even know you can't see it........giving you guys back the upper hand.

    If you get angry - she wins.  If you lose it - she wins.  If you cry and are upset - she wins.  If you ignore her totally.....YOU WIN and she will get fed up or find someone else to bother.

    As hard as it might be, what would Ju tell you to do? I am thinking its the iggy bit otherwise, my hubby has a bag full of karate sparring mitts in various sizes if you really do need them and gumshields (not trying to joke around but maybe just lighten your mood a tad).  Hell if you need it, I'll send the lads round (both blackbelts) and I'll come too, you know what they say about little people - BIG tempers LOL

    Jenni, seriously breathe in (and out) and count to 20 and remember the sort of person YOU are, Ju was and how you want YOUR kids raised, I am betting its not like the Grandma is acting.

    Love & Strength

    Debs xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Jenni.  I cannot believe how that woman is behaving, the MIL from hell right enough!  You focus on yourself and the kids and remember Ju loved you and he knew how much you loved him and how well you looked after him!  How dare she carry on like that.  Good on Jordan for supporting her wonderful mum!  Don't waste any more energy on her hun, she;'s definitely not worth it!  Love and hugs.  Caroline XX