Everything changes from tomorrow....

1 minute read time.

Hi all,

My first blog posted but just wanted to relay my fears and get some support...

My dad was diagnosed with bowel cancer on 29th June 2011, had a CT scan the next day, results are there is mets in the liver and a problem with his left lung.  Saw the lung specialist who organised a lung biopsy, got the results.  Dad has a primary SCLC with mets in the liver and bone.  Starts chemo tomorrow for the lung, they are leaving the bowel, why because it's not worth it??  The priority is the lung which will kill him within weeks, they can stent the bowel if necessary but would rather leave it for now....

Since the original diagnosis (which we've since had a warped laugh at ourselves for being upset over that knowing what was to come, I mean IF he only had a contained bowel cancer it really would be easy right) anyway, the waiting has been hard, getting an actual full diagnosis has been hard and getting a treatment plan has been hard, but now I want to go back, freeze time because during that time dad has been dad, he's been fit and well and we've done lots of things together (mainly walks to the pub but hey, who i am to argue and not participate??)  anyway from tomorrow everything will change, dad HAS got CANCER.  It IS real, and it is going to change his life, our lives,  forever.

Molly xx

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Molly, support coming your way...

    Wnat I can say is that, yes in one way your life changes forever, but in another way, its the same... in that your dad is still your dad whether he has cancer or not and he was still who he was before diagnosis( though already having it) and he will still be your dad now you know he has it and will be your dad forever. (hope that made sense!) You sound like you have a sense of humour, so keep it up- it does help a lot. It will be hard, and we all wish we could freeze time sometimes, but it sounds like you have a good family and you certainly have a great macland family to support you too- just shout and we are here....

    Wishing you all positive thoughts and a big hug

    Little My (((xxx)))  

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Aw thank you Little My, I do know what you mean, it's easy to be consumed by it all isn't it, god knows what is going through dad's mind right now...

    Just need to get dad home now, they'd finally made the big decision to move to Spain in February (they brought a holiday home 7 years ago) and now they're back and their bloody tenants are being awkward!!  So i have house guests....  oh hum

    Take care angel xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hey Molly, cancer is a real bummer! What Litty My says is so true, everything changes but it does stay the same - its rather surreal actually. My Mum has inoperable Pancreatic Cancer and the last few months have been absolutely dreadful and absolutey wonderful at the same time - very strange thing to say I know. Life always has a way of getting in the way of decisions, doesn't it. Dad said to me recently, if there is one thing that this whole 'thing' has taught him is, don't put off what you want to do... so now I try and live my life like a dog, (Little My no comment from you pls!!) in the moment, for the now. Make the most of all the precious time you have left. Sending you lots of strengh and support. Peanutx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Molly, I sent a reply and it didn't come on... grrr this site drives me mad sometimes...anyway, just wanted to say that having done both sides... been a carer and having it, I think one of the hardest things is caring as you are always wondering how they are and what they are thinking whereas when you have it, you can just be and get on with it. I bet your dad is thinking what a great daughter he has! Hope you still manage to do a few trips to the pub even if he can't drink...

    Sounds like sod's law has visited your house too.. hope it gets sorted soon and wishing you strength for the journey ahead... and we are here to support you and/or give you a laugh if you ever need one..

    Peanut, I'm saying nothing! :-)

    Big hug

    Little Myxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hello Molly,

    Well I see you have met Little My:) and Peanut. thats two people that will help you greatly on a down day, hopefully I can step up to the mark too.

    It is so true that nothing is the same and yet it is. You sound like a wonderful carring daughter and Im sure your dad ia taking great comfort in that. Being the carer is terribly hard to cope with, as Little My said, if your the patient you have a different frame of mind, I've got it, I'm going to fight it. Hard for us to watch though (carer for my hubby).

    Next time to go to the pub with your dad have one for me, I,m getting fed up with tea x

    Love to you and your family

    Shaz(((((((((((XXXXX))))))))))))))