Coping on Mother's Day - some support from the Community

4 minute read time.

A image of pink tulip blooms, with some small blue forget-me-not type flowers

This Sunday, it’s Mother’s Day in the UK, so in this Community News Blog we’re taking some time to celebrate and remember mums. We're also sending out a big virtual hug to anyone who finds the celebration a difficult time to get through.

We know that Mother’s Day can be particularly tough for those who can't see their mum, or other loved ones, for many different reasons. The Community is here for you if you need emotional support.

For those who have lost a child, lost their mum or have a difficult relationship with their mum, it can be a particularly emotional time. Certain days or events like these can often trigger lots of different emotions, no matter how much time has passed. Our thoughts go out this weekend to anyone grieving for their mums, or mother-figures.

You can find support from members who understand in the bereaved family and friends group in the Community.

Member Hales4 recently joined the group after sadly loosing her mum. If you'd like to offer some support, or need some support yourself, you can join in the conversation here.

“I wish I could feel her presence as a real person just one more time not just photos and memories.” - Hales4, in the bereaved family and friends group.

Macmillan also have some support for you through the information and support pages of the website. You can find general advice about coping with bereavement here. You'll find information and resources which might help you and there's also some guidance for anyone supporting others with their grief. 

If you need specific support with remembering your loved one on special days, we have some support available here.

It can also help to talk things through with someone who is there to listen. Our Support Line staff will be available throughout the weekend, as the service is available 7 days a week, 8am-8pm on freephone 0808 808 00 00, email or live webchat.

There are other, dedicated bereavement, charities who can support you with your bereavement. If you're struggling this weekend, you might also want to reach out to Cruse Bereavement Care or AtaLoss.org. If you click on the name of each organisation, you can link to their websites to find further details of their support services.

  

In the cancer chat group, member IamSara asked the Community for ideas to make Mothers Day a special one for her terminally ill mum. If you're in a similar situation and want to talk, or have any ideas to share, you can join in the conversation here.

"...it's her last Mother's Day and I'd like to make it special." - IamSara, Cancer chat group.

It might also be really hard if your relationship with your mum has changed due to cancer. You might be caring for your mum, or you might need care from your mum that you haven't needed for a very long time. Whatever the situation, there's often someone who understands in the Community. 

If your mum, or another loved one has cancer, why not take a look at the family and friends group for support. There are many members, just like you, who have questions about how best to give support, or who need some emotional support themselves.

"I don't know anyone else with family members who have cancer so joined here so that I didn't feel so isolated in this, my family don't really talk about it and the only person I feel I can talk to is my Mum but then I don't want to make her feel worse and to be honest I feel selfish telling her how I'm struggling when she is the one who is actually going through it." - daughternumber2, family and friends group.

If you're looking after mum, or indeed any other loved one with cancer, our carers only group is also here for you. Many people find it really helpful to be able to chat to others who understand the very particular challenges around being a carer. 

Some of you might be giving unpaid help and support to someone with cancer, who could not manage without your help, but not actually consider yourself a carer. You may think you are just helping out. Recognising that you are a carer can be an important step in getting the support you need. You can read more about Macmillan's support for carers on our information and support pages here.

An image of a bouquet of forget-me-nots, small blue flowers

Mothers Day will most likely be trickier for a great number of families due to the current lockdown situation in the UK. Whatever your situation, we hope our Community cancer forum can help you feel a lot less alone this weekend.

Our Support Line teams are also here for all of you. Sometimes it can help to talk things through with someone who’s there to listen. They’re available 7 days a week, 8am-8pm on freephone 0808 808 00 00, email or live webchat.

You can also comment below, or email the team at community@macmillan.org.uk if you have any feedback or need the team's help with using the site.

Anonymous