What a horrid day. I had a visit from my GP and I thought, Oh! that's nice and caring. No such thing. All she wanted was for me to sign my life away by agreeing to complete a DNR. I know it's for my own good but, up until her visit, I was having quite a good day, just for a change.
I sat and smiled, and when through all her questions showing no emotion...…….but as soon as she left, I broke down into a blubbering…
I am so fed up with this business. I want to scream, Please Help Me!. But I might as well be in space, as no one seems to be hearing me.
So much pain today, bloated aching bowels. My whole chest and stomach feels like its being squeeze. Just overwhelming pain. I had an oesophageal stent put in 2 weeks ago, which has worked wonders for being able to swallow. But now I just cant eat because of the constant overwhelming…
Back home after having stent fitted. I had to stay in hospital overnight for them get my pain under control. I was on a specialist cancer ward, so you would think that they would know what the were doing. Thankfully the surgical and anaesthetic teams were brilliant and have done a very good job under testing conditions. Unfortunately the nursing care was a total shambles. I was left in agony all night, as the nursing…
Had my staging results today, T3, N2, Mx. Tumours is extending through the Oesophagus and is very close to the heart and Aorta, and just to add to my misery, I have lesions on my thoracic spine. I have an appointment to see my surgeon on Monday 19th November, but I'm not expecting good news. I have tried the Oramorph and Oxynorm to try to relieve my back pain but nothing seems to touch it. I would give so much to…
Got my final Endoscopy today which will tell me if I have enough healthy Oesophagus left to enable my surgeon to agree to operate. I think they call it the 'Ivor Lewis' operation. It's no understatement to say that I'm terrified because I am already in a lot of pain when I try to swallow, so I've no idea how they are going to get their instruments down my throat.
I am so grateful to this site for…
