Unfortunately I am new here...

Welcome to the forum Emem77, I’m so sorry you’ve been diagnosed and have to go through further surgery. Is your vocal chord compromised by the tumour? Vocal chord problems are one of the side affects we have to sign off on before surgery but many of us are lucky enough to avoid issues. Your right vocal chord may well improve, I read that a lot on here. I was lucky despite a tricky major 6hr surgery my vocal chords were unaffected, so the suggestion of a tracheotomy, despite being understandably scary, might just be your surgeon covering all scenarios just to prepare you.

The waiting time is the worst. I found once the treatment path was underway it all happens so quickly there’s less time to dwell on the ifs and maybes.

I think many of us find it easier to off load to a stranger or on a forum like this. I have learnt the only people who really get it, are those that have been through it. Others around you may try but it’s hard for them to understand our deepest thoughts and fears and often our love ones just can’t handle it so don’t want to talk about it.

Of course we think of worst case scenarios especially when we have children, that’s natural. All the feelings you are getting are “normal” and human. Having been pretty stable emotionally all my life, I would find myself properly weeping when on my own. I discovered a Maggie’s centre near me and they were lovely. I spoke to a counsellor there and was able to tell her all my darkest thoughts, which I daren’t tell my daughter (my support) for fear of scaring her. Maybe you could find one near you? Or the Macmillan helpline are very supportive.

You already have a lot on your plate, please feel free to offload or ask any questions on here. It’s not the fastest of forums but the members are honest, caring people who have been or are going through the same as you.

Hopefully some others with recovered vocal chords or similar will pop on and give their experience too.

Best wishes x

I have meduallry thyroid cancer. I had a full thyroidectomy. My scar is from my right ear down and around my neck, I am 10 weeks post op and it’s looking great. The side effects of emotions from my thyroid removal and the surgery is a different story.

i am 27, I don’t have any children but i do understand the feelings of stress,upset and feeling fed up. At first I kept it all to myself and I didn’t understand apart from the situation itself why I was feeling like this. Gradually I’ve learnt to open up, and say exactly how I’m feeling at that time.

please remember it’s okay not to be okay

I feel there’s a taboo with cancer and no one knows how to approach it. I felt like a burden on my family and my fiancé , and kept apologising that he was in this situation. I understand you feel fed up and you say your boyfriend probably is, but the truth is, he’s not, he cares, but he’s hurting to. There’s been times I have barely spoken with my fiancé and just sat there quiet and zoned out. I have brain fog at times and can’t even hold a conversation. I spoken with my surgeon and he said this is all normal given the circumstances of having surgery and my thyroid completely removed. He also went through other symptoms with me and it gave me peace of mind

you said you don’t know where to start but you already have. By posting on here. No matter who you speak to, be open, it’s not healthy to keep it to yourself.

I’ve been looking at these forums for months and didn’t post because there were all post from years ago and I felt like no one would respond, however after seeing newer post it feels good to comment.

there’s also a lot of facebook groups that I find very useful.